The Pilgrim's Progress

The Big Moooooove!

2009-08-01T22:53:00.002+08:00

I'm moving my blog to the address below:

http://gloryallthecross.wordpress.com

Click here!

Farewell Aunty Oi Lin

2009-07-29T23:44:00.000+08:00

In the sweet by and by, we shall meet on that beautiful shore.

I did not know her well. She was the interim Sunday School teacher when Aunty Sushiang left for Melbourne and before Aunty Amy took over. I wasn't very well behaved in one particular class, I remember. >.< I last saw her more than a year ago, when El and I met her at Cassia Crescent. We chatted a bit. Once in a while we will also hear about what's going on with her life from Aunty Theresa.

Well, as much as we will all miss her, we know that she is in the best place possible - with the Lord Himself, and away from all the tears and sighs, sufferings and pains of this world. And we will see her again, when this passing world is done, and we will behold one another with the love and joy of being able to worship God eternally without sin.

Thank you Lord, for her salvation, without which there is no hope.

Oh the arrogance...

2009-07-23T14:47:00.001+08:00

It's very sad to read something like that. Not just because I believe his faith is placed in the wrong place, but his interpretation of religion is wrong.

I've long been wanting to write, publicly, on what Fundamental Christian means. Afterall, my facebook status declares that I'm a fundamental Christian. No I don't make bombs and kill "infidels". I have good relationships and friendships with many non-Christians. But with the equivocating of fundamental Christians to fundamental Muslims, and fundamental Muslim to terrorists, we conservative Christians who are holding to the fundamental tenets of Christianity have been wrongfully equivocated with violence and intolerance.

I really should work my brains and my pen (keyboard) soon.

The silliest smear | Democracy in America | Economist.com

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Backlogs - The Result of Laziness

2009-07-05T23:36:00.004+08:00

Many significant things happened in the month of June too, but for some reasons I have not had the desire to type them out here, so now I'm suffering the consequence of having to recall to record and hence the first hand emotions are lost. =(

The most significant of all is of course the YAF camp, which came to pass from 17th to 20th June. The bungalow at Tanjong Puteri was perfect! Thank God for providing that despite the last minute reservation. We had a wonderful session of learning and fun and fellowship. I really learned alot about Creationism and the basis of our faith in Creationism. Let me just say this, Christians are not anti-scientist. We are against the biased proposition of a theory over another, and of which is given a priority so high it is taught as facts in schools in the name of secularism. Too many proves of Creationism and flaws of Evolution have been discussed in the videos by learned scientists, not religious leaders. They are people with access to the knowledge and academics and research. Too many, I won't list them here, but would be glad to direct anyone interested to relevant urls and also to share with you face to face.

Anyway, we had great fun playing games and simply relaxing. For the working folks, this is a good break from work. Though eventually I didn't get to ride my horse, I still had great fun. So thank God for that too.

The camp also saw SJ's mother willing to come to Christ. I was so overjoyed I teared. It also gave me an opportunity to have some heart to heart talk with SJ. =)

Astro-updates!

Jupiter is up now at night so look to your east after 10pm or 11pm. The bright star in the sky that doesn't twinkle is the biggest planet in our solar system, Jupiter itself! Saturn is setting at the moment so easy to see. Constellation Scorpio is up, together to teapot Sagittarus.

It has been a lovely holiday so far. Now I'm starting to work and man it's tiring. But ah wells, life's responsibility demands work.

This Sabbath's updates!

Today Leon and Jacinta dropped by and joined us in worship before displaying some books for us to buy. I was really refreshed by their presence. Knowing Jacinta was no coincidence, and I thank God for providing for me a sister-in-Christ, of which through her I know another faithful sister Jaime too. They were my encouragement in school. Even though I attend JSM's bible study, I didn't fellowship with them as often as Jaime and Jacinta. I got to know Jacinta the first semester in EL1101E tutorial. She sat behind me, and together with 3 other strangers we formed a group. Believe of not, before I learned that she is a Christian from a conservative church I had an inkling, really! During the time of my breakup she was also a source of great comfort and encouragement to me. =) Leon and Pastor discussed at length some issues, and I can tell Pastor was also encouraged to see another young man wanting to serve God full time. I thank God for the healthy and chubby Leonaidas too! Splurged on some books, which is worth it. I just hope I'll get back to the discipline of reading.

I really miss fellowshipping with sisters in Christ. I'm so looking forward to meet Jaime and Jacinta again soon!

Nostalgia Express

2009-07-02T21:54:00.003+08:00

Taking a relief job at Swiss Cottage again is a fast trip down nostalgia lane. There are many changes. More teachers are gone since the last time I went there for relief 2 years after graduating. Now it has been 6 years since I've graduated. Ms Annie Tan, Mrs Constance Wong, Mr Ang, Mr Ngoh, Mdm Zainab, Mrs Sally Yu - these are some of the few teachers who have taught me and are still there. The rest have moved to other schools, among them two of my favourite teachers of all times - Mr Jason Lim and Ms Kaur. Some teachers aged significantly, while others look the same as when I last saw them.

Everytime I relief in Swiss reaffirms my desire to teach. I have no idea why - well I have some idea, but I don't want to write a whole page about my aspirations. My O level year marked one of the most significant identity-shaping time of my life, and definitely without the help of passionate and caring and patient teachers like Ms Tan, Kaur, and Mrs Wong and Mr Lim, I could not have made it thus far. I wonder if I'll still get the same drive if I go to another school. Going back to my alma mater makes me proud to be called a Swiss again.

From an old TCS Drama starring Chen Han Wei, 阳光列车2， the song celebrating teachers:

蒲公英

知识的门由你开启走向光明的路是你指引
眚眚学子幼苗长在大地里师恩是春雨
每天用爱将智慧灌慨培育我至诚至勇胸怀
教导我坚强鼓励从不间断开创美好明天
我们是高飞的蒲公英您的叮咛祝福是和风
陪伴我自信翱翔不怕迷失方向
飞向阳光绚丽的远方

Whims and Fancies

2009-06-10T00:28:00.003+08:00

I feel like moving my blog. Actually I've been thinking about that for some time. First, this blog still uses the EandC.co@gmail.com log-in, which is almost a year ancient. Second, I find Wordpress.com more organized for me. Over there I can file my posts into different categories for the wee number of people who reads my blog. :P Those of you (hi!) who read this blog will know that some posts are just my personal rants and updates that resembles tabloids and totally un-simulating the mind. Few articles when I actually use my brains were written, and may be more interesting and slightly worth a few seconds of your life. Some are personal stuff that only my good friends will care about and the rest will read it as a novel or a gossip. With wordpress, I can file them accordingly, so that I can refer back to them easily whenever I want to. Here I just have to use search or keep going back till I find it.

But then again, I'm nostalgic to my blog. This is the first blog that I've ever been writing. The title is a metaphor for my life (read the very first blogpost for longer explanation), and it's hard for me to move away. Ya, I can name my new blog (or online diary, since I won't be using Blogspot technically), The Pilgrim's Progress, it won't be the same as my first blog.

Hmm, I shall sit on the idea for a while longer.

Meanwhile, I like this quote:

Some readers and critics will inevitably object, saying that this is a publicity stunt. To them I solemnly say: you are half-right. Of course I am seeking publicity for the magazine. I would argue with the term "stunt," though, but only because of the popular assumption that a stunt is something silly. (The dictionary definition is a feat of daring, but we do not live in the dictionary.)

- From http://www.newsweek.com/id/200857?tid=relatedcl, where the Editor of Newsweek explains why Stephen Colbert the comedian is guest-editing this magazine.

By the way, Stephen Colbert the mock political pundit comedian is doing his show from Baghdad this week, as a tribute to the soldiers and to bring attention to the Iraq War again after America became cold to the happenings in Iraq after the economic downturn. That's awfully patriotic of him. And I think, for the first time, that he deserve to be higher in the list of "100 most influential people" in Times magazine than Jon Stewart this year. I still love Stewart, but I think Colbert has caught up and fast replacing The Daily Show in the political comedy scene. Stewart will always be the critical voice that often makes you think and realise things you don't normally get by watching mainstream media. Colbert is more of a cartharsis, he brings attention to anything he covers, and creates comedy with his witty puns and non sequitars. There should be more to Colbert than I wrote here, but I seldom watch Colbert, not as much as Stewart.

Oh, recently I discovered another comic I love. Late night talk show host Craig Ferguson, from The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson. Another funny and intelligent (and good looking, haha!) stand-up comedian.

Man, do I love comedy.

Obama's Speech at Cairo

2009-06-06T00:54:00.009+08:00

I've just finished listening to Obama's speech at Cairo. There have been much ado about this speech, hailing its significance in the peach process between America and the Middle East, particularly the Muslim states. I don't claim to be an expert in politics, all the following are my thoughts after listening to the speech.

Obama is a very clever and powerful politician. His speech, I believe, manages to send a message of friendship (political friendship) to the muslims in the Middle East, at least the non radicals. I think he has done a good job in pandering (for lack of a better word) to his audience and in positioning himself as a disinterested (not uninterested) America head-of-state. He doesn't come across as condescening, and in fact he knows how to use his ties and experience in Islamic Indonesia as a mean to endear himself with the audience.

Obama doesn't come across as condescending, especially in his justification and explanation of America's post 9/11 reaction and the Iraq War. I haven't really heard Bush's full speeches before but from the snippets and clips, hes sometimes he sounded as if Iraq deserved it. But granted, Obama has the benefit of a 20/20 hindsight, and is free from the load of American's anger immediately after 9/11.

For decades then, there has been a stalemate: two peoples with legitimate aspirations, each with a painful history that makes compromise elusive. It's easy to point fingers -- for Palestinians to point to the displacement brought about by Israel's founding, and for Israelis to point to the constant hostility and attacks throughout its history from within its borders as well as beyond. But if we see this conflict only from one side or the other, then we will be blind to the truth: The only resolution is for the aspirations of both sides to be met through two states, where Israelis and Palestinians each live in peace and security.

Obama also didn't come across as one taking sides, as seem from above. But, this being a speech targetted at the Middle-East, there was the expected heavier weightage addressing the muslims.

This issue has been a source of tension between the United States and the Islamic Republic of Iran. For many years, Iran has defined itself in part by its opposition to my country, and there is in fact a tumultuous history between us. In the middle of the Cold War, the United States played a role in the overthrow of a democratically elected Iranian government. Since the Islamic Revolution, Iran has played a role in acts of hostage-taking and violence against U.S. troops and civilians. This history is well known. Rather than remain trapped in the past, I've made it clear to Iran's leaders and people that my country is prepared to move forward. The question now is not what Iran is against, but rather what future it wants to build.

And that was the public olive branch, and should Iran reject it, Iran would be basked in bad light by the non-radicals.

America does not presume to know what is best for everyone, just as we would not presume to pick the outcome of a peaceful election. But I do have an unyielding belief that all people yearn for certain things: the ability to speak your mind and have a say in how you are governed; confidence in the rule of law and the equal administration of justice; government that is transparent and doesn't steal from the people; the freedom to live as you choose. These are not just American ideas; they are human rights. And that is why we will support them everywhere.

This is a good save; accusations towards America after the Iraq War has been its imposition of democracy. Here Obama does not deny that they want democracy in Iraq, but he manages to not come across as exporting Americanism to Iraq, as radicals believe and rallies against.

That is the spirit we need today. People in every country should be free to choose and live their faith based upon the persuasion of the mind and the heart and the soul. This tolerance is essential for religion to thrive, but it's being challenged in many different ways.
Among some Muslims, there's a disturbing tendency to measure one's own faith by the rejection of somebody else's faith. The richness of religious diversity must be upheld -- whether it is for Maronites in Lebanon or the Copts in Egypt. (Applause.) And if we are being honest, fault lines must be closed among Muslims, as well, as the divisions between Sunni and Shia have led to tragic violence, particularly in Iraq.

I think he is quite bold here, to be advocating religious freedom. I'm ignorant of the extent of radicalism among his audience, of course, but radicals would not take it well. Perhaps not even conservatives. But the moderates and the progressive would, I guess.

The best part that I love? He addressed women's right to education. My personal belief is that women's education is a huge step to combat abuse and the perpetuation of extremism like honour killing and forcing child brides to marry old men. Education widens the paradigm of women, let them understand that their interpretation of the Koran need not come uninformed and solely from mouths of extremist teachers. If women themselves do not understand what is wrong, men would have a freeway to perpetuate their insanity. So hoorah to Obama for advocating education for women.

Now, let me be clear: Issues of women's equality are by no means simply an issue for Islam. In Turkey, Pakistan, Bangladesh, Indonesia, we've seen Muslim-majority countries elect a woman to lead. Meanwhile, the struggle for women's equality continues in many aspects of American life, and in countries around the world.
I am convinced that our daughters can contribute just as much to society as our sons. (Applause.) Our common prosperity will be advanced by allowing all humanity -- men and women -- to reach their full potential. I do not believe that women must make the same choices as men in order to be equal, and I respect those women who choose to live their lives in traditional roles. But it should be their choice. And that is why the United States will partner with any Muslim-majority country to support expanded literacy for girls, and to help young women pursue employment through micro-financing that helps people live their dreams.

Again, he was able to avoid sounding like he's pointing fingers at Islam for the oppression of women by mentioning other countries. He also does not come across as "if you are traditional, that's wrong" by saying (and I agree), that it is alright to adhere to traditional roles if that is their choice.

All in all, I recognise the Obama trademark of HOPE in this speech. His ending with a vision that calls for the transcending of past and working towards the future, the calling out of the youths to do their part, and the recognition of difficulties. These brings back memories of his speeches during his presidential campaign, and his bipartisan speech at his victory. If it was McCain, I honestly doubt his ability to carry the tone and inspiration of this speech, even if the words are the same. I must say, his connections to muslim blood or the fact that he is non-white helps - they are semiotic resources in deconstructing the image of a white American oppressor that Middle-easterns who hate America have all these years. That's why, overall, I think Obama is a very clever and powerful politician.

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Now I'm going to say something my non-Christian readers may find controversial. Well, this is my blog, and the following reflects my opinion, and that is thoughts through the eyes of one who has certain beliefs in her. The following does not represent my church or the denomination I belong to.

Well, I would not have felt this way if not for the fact that Obama has always been reiterating himself to be a Christian.

Too many tears have been shed. Too much blood has been shed. All of us have a responsibility to work for the day when the mothers of Israelis and Palestinians can see their children grow up without fear; when the Holy Land of the three great faiths is the place of peace that God intended it to be; when Jerusalem is a secure and lasting home for Jews and Christians and Muslims, and a place for all of the children of Abraham to mingle peacefully together as in the story of Isra -- (applause) -- as in the story of Isra, when Moses, Jesus, and Mohammed, peace be upon them, joined in prayer. (Applause.)

I don't think that someone who is really a born-again believer will be able to say the last line without major cringing and inward wrenching. To place your Saviour and your God in the same position as prophets is not just wrong, it's blasphemous. (Again let me reinterate: this is my view as a Christian, whether or not you believe Jesus is God or if He is higher than Moses and Mohammed is your opinion. Freedom of religion, people, and I'm not imposing this view on anyone.) I also have problem with him talking as though he knows what God wants, and these are lines that are not biblical, like "when the Holy Land of the three great faiths is the place of peace that God intended it to be". Not really, 'cos the Bible says Jerusalem is for the children of Israel. (Again, this is my opinion and belief, you may choose to disagree.) This too, isn't biblical: "The people of the world can live together in peace. We know that is God's vision. Now that must be our work here on Earth." God's intention is "not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance." (2 Peter 3:9), and repentence through the Lord Jesus Christ.

Imagine my disappointment with Obama when I hear him say things like that, not just here but some of his previous speeches too. But this only goes to prove that I must see politicians as separated from his said belief. None, in fact, should expect politicians to act like Christians just because they claim to be one. What I mean is, yes, if I know the stateman in charge of me is Christian I rejoice because I hope that he is really a Chrisitan and his faith will guide him in making good decisions for the people. But I must expect that as a politician he can either 1) not be a Christian but claims to be one. This is not common in SG but very much in America, where religion and politics are still heavily intertwined. Or 2) He needs to straddle the obligations as a politician in a secular state to give rights to and say things about other religion against what he has been taught. Whether he has therefore sinned is between him and God. What he is in real life needs to be judged on a wider scale by people who know him personally. All I want to say is, never expect a politician to be who he say he is. A politician is a mask which comes with great responsibility. When the mask is put on, one must be prepared to say things and do things contrary to his beliefs, and necessary so when one is in charge of an interdependent society of different faiths. It would be a different story if the state is a Christian state, and hence the Christian leader must therefore abide and act exclusively according to his religious belief. Just a side note: there is no biblical basis to form a Christian sate. That duty of leadership with exclusive religious obligation belongs to that of a religious leader, aka the Pastor in his church.

As one judging Obama's presidency, we must remove ourselves from judging his spirituality, only when we want to evaluate him as a Christian.

Lesson of the day? Don't be a politician. -.- I always use this analogy: Can you sit through a movie where your (insert loved ones, for e.g., mother) is being insulted, misrepresented or humiliated? I can't. And no one should say I must be able to, because that's my mother and I love her. Similarly, I cannot and I do not wish to be placed in a position where I see/hear my Saviour and my God, whom I love, being misrepresented, insulted and humiliated. Much less me being the one who misrepresents Him (like a politician does, and like how Obama does). So, lesson to myself is, don't be a politician.

The Month of May

2009-06-04T22:06:00.008+08:00

I haven't blogged for weeks even though it's the holiday! I've had a wonderful month of May after the exams are done, and here are some highlights!

The day the exam ends, I met Shama before tuition. What awaited me when I saw her was Dumbo and a big bouquet! Wonderful though the presents were, she made me lugged these two big things around Plaza without a plastic bag. -.- But I appreciate them. :)

On Sunday, during lunch time, Eliel played "Happy Birthday" and the church knew it was my birthday. I do thank Eliel for the thoughtfullness. It doesn't need to be material gift, the thought counts alot.

Anyway so that day was second Sunday, so we brought the Moral Welfare Home people out. Deacon Tan and family surprised me with a cake (coffee cake, 'cause I'm known to love coffee in church. haha.)! That was really nice of them. =) I don't have a pic of the cake, we ate them before I could take them. Too bad the youths weren't around. But I'm very happy for the surprise they gave me!

On my birthday itself, there was the E-lang lunch! It's going to become an every semester thing, after every exams. This time round it's Kushinbo. Lovely place and good food, but a tad expensive, so only go there if it's an outing with good friends or during special occasions. But the best part is, I got to see LEONAIDAS! (I still don't know how to spell his name...) And he's so cute and can walk now. Haha. But not everyone turned up, some couldn't make it. Anyway I had a wonderful time with the E-lang peeps, and I got to catch up with Jacinta a bit. :) Oh, and some of them knows it was my birthday, so they wished me, and RJ and Jacinta even got me some gifts. :) I had a wonderful time!

On 17th May, I went to watch Much Ado About Nothing! Outdoor! Singapore Repertory Theatre! Adrian Pang! With my JC mates!! Elaine, Gwen, Nana and Afiah. :) Lovely people! They gave me a surprise birthday celeb, all wearing blue (I did not, sadly) and got me a slice of Secret Recipe cake and a beatiful rose. Really, that was the a beautiful rose, better than many that I've seen. :) And Afiah gave me a present, a poster/card of the solar system, and I think that is a very nice present, 'cause the best presents are those that people gave because they know you'll love it. Another kind of best presents are the thoughtful ones and the useful ones. (Though, in my defence, I don't know what my dear friends like most of the time so I always give lousy presents. :P sorry!)

Why am I talking about presents? Back to MAAN. I think Adrian Pang is a wonderful actor, especially in drama-comedy like MAAN. I haven't watched Red Thread so I don't know how is he as a dramatic actor, but looking at his past CV in the MAAN booklet, he is pretty accomplished. Perhaps due to the role of Benedict, he is the only one who stands out. Not even Beatrice stands out despite role she has on the play itself. Watching Adrian Pang on stage makes me wish he will stop doing the crap he does on TV, especially channel 8. Coincidentally though, a week later on the TODAY paper, he was featured in an interview about his family, and he said that he knows working on TV compromises certain artistic standard, but these are the things a father needs to do for the stability of the famly. So true, so true. Sad yet true.

Overall, it was a lovely night out with the girls, and I did have some fun getting lost in Elaine's car. Haha. Very thankful for these friends from JC. They may not be my best of friends in the sense that I can be all heartfelt and open with them, but they are wonderful friends - those that I would love to keep in touch with all the way through different stages of our lives, be there at their wedding, their baby shower, etc. :) I got home pretty late that night, and have LOTS to do before heading for Tioman the next wee hours of the morning. (6.15am at Orchard, seriously??)

And so the next day, after a last minute late night packing of telescopes and minimum luggage, I went to the beautiful Tioman for Astrobash!! Beautiful pictures on my facebook. It's a horrible pic-putting system here on blogspot. But the night sky was beautiful, though according to other Astrobashers it was not the best (Tinggi was I heard). But hey! I saw the Milky Way for the first time in my life! Thank the Lord! :) Jiayi helped me adjust my bro's SLR camera to take the Milky Way. Turned out not bad, but not as good as his own pics. Haha. Lugging my telescope there was kinda a waste, cause it was over there that I spent my entire obs night LEARNING how to use the Go To. (I'm a manual idiot.) Again, thanks to Jiayi who patiently taught me a few things, I finally know what on earth my Go To can do. And I'm gonna use it on this coming YAF Camp! cgcyafcamp.wordpress.com. Join me!

Oh and I got to snorkel too for the first time! Beautiful sea life! But the package we booked was the crappier one, the other one got to go to 5 spots and those are better spots, more corals and diversity of marine life. But nvm, I'll snorkel again some day! Maybe I'll go back to Tioman (another side, not Paya) or go elsewhere to snorkel. On another day some astrobashers went fishing (real fishing and real big fish!) and some went jungle trekking. I, sadly and regretfully, did not go for both. Partly because I'm out of cash, and partly because I'm tired and I was preparing for an all-nighter ob, (which did not happen but it did last till rather late in the night).

All in all, lovely astrobash. Kinda on my own cos, haha, Linda is attached now. :P But I got to know more friends from the society!
On the monday after I came back from Astrobash, I joined some E-lang peeps for a gathering at Dr Wang Xin's place. Great place, great host, and a great time of hanging out. Some swam, together with Dr Wang. Learned a little gossips about some professors. Hehe. :P But I love hanging out with friends. =)

And of cause, meeting up the gang! Chris, Shama and Anna. Anna came back from Aus so there were goodies! Got a new shawl and a bear. Hehe. After Seoul Garden we watched Night At the Museum 2, which is HILARIOUS!!!!!! If you love 1, you'll love 2. I couldn't watch the show properly because I was laughing so hard. The Einstein part, I was laughing so hard I couldn't breathe! LOL. Now I want an Einstein bobble head doll!

Ah wells, all in all it was a lovely May. The results came out, and I dropped by 0.01, which is good enough 'cause I was expecting worse. Thank the Lord!

Now fun's over, I got to hunt for jobs so I can start immediately after the youth camp.

The Cupboard Adventure

2009-05-10T23:35:00.003+08:00

Today we went to Ikea to get a new cupboard for my bro. It's a dented new set so they were selling it $80 cheaper. We went there, it looked alright, so we got it. We also got our 舅父("kao fu" in Cantonese) to help us to transport in his lorry. It turned out to be quite an adventure, and I learnt a few lessons:

1) Always dismantle the cupboard before transportation no matter how small it looks to you. Ignore any belief that it can fit into the lift.

2) Put the cupboard lying on its back instead of sideways if you want to avoid hitting a carpark lamp on the way out.

3) Dismantling a cupboard is not that hard, really. You need patience and strength and nice passers-by who won't "tsk" at you when you block their way at the lift lobby. (For tips on how to dismantle at appropriate places, see tip 1.)

4) Cut your toenails so it won't bleed when you knock your toe onto something.

5) Have an awesome uncle who doesn't get angry for being dragged after a tennis game to do this crap and at your stupidity for thinking a fully set up cupboard is transportable.

In the end it ended up with more dents and a HUGE scar when the lamp hit. I may want to try my hands some plastic surgery for the cupboard if my brother doesn't protest.

Here's the half dismantled cupboard.

Freedom in less than 24 hours!

2009-05-07T16:25:00.003+08:00

I'm never never never taking a 5 core module semester ever again. Though I'm happy tomorrow is the last paper, I'm still sad that I'll do badly this semester.

But ah wells. TOMORROW IS THE LAST PAPER!!!! I'm so excited I'm planning a rough list of what to do post-exam already. HAHAHAHAHHAA!

1) I'm so finishing season 8 of Whose Line. And watch Chip Esten on Cold Case. Hehe.

2) Shop for the belated presents of Huining, De En, and Felicia (and maybe Aunty Rachel and Uncle Joseph if I have spare moolah).

3) EXERCISE!!!! I miss running (or rather, walking)!

4) MOVIES MOVIES MOVIES!

5) Read ~~a book~~ books. :P I need to be more cerebral.

6) Catch up with the world news.

7) Record all my spendings for April. :( And realise in horror that I spent too much money.

8) Ok I got to read up/organise this VPP thingy from the notes.

9) LEAP FOR JOY!

10) Enjoy the smell of freedom before I start work.

Haha I anyhow squeezed out some dumb stuff to add up to 10. But WOO! I can't wait! Meeting up with Tammy and Aunty Sushiang soon! And the musketeers. And watching Much Ado About Nothing with Nana, Gwen, Afiah and Elaine on 17th May. Mother's Day makan on 14th. Tomorrow celebration/farewell lunch with LSI project mates. Yum yum! Must exercise soon.

And I'm glad the ELang makan is on 13th May. Hehe. ;-) It's like a celebration even if they don't know.

Les Miserables

2009-05-01T21:34:00.001+08:00

Man, I'm so blown away by the Les Miserables (10th Anniversary Concert) that I'm gonna try to find the DVD for it after my exams. Meanwhile, youtube will suffice. :D

Childhood dream part deux

2009-04-26T23:59:00.003+08:00

Yup there is still something in me that wants to act. After watching Whose Line is it Anyway?, and reading up a little on Improv comedy, I yearn for the opportunity to try. But I don't think that will happen in Singapore. :(

One of my favourite Narrate game, by two of my favourite improvisers. :) They almost seamlessly improvised each others' parts. Enjoy.

Busy BZ Bee

2009-04-23T20:23:00.002+08:00

One more day to Felicia's wedding! Tomorrow will be helping out with the church decor, then on Saturday itself it's one whole day gone. Haha. Not much time left to study. But, hey, not everyday you'll see a wedding. (I realise I use many null subjects while writing blog posts. Haha!) One more day to the wedding and I'm popping pimples. -.- But, what the hey! It's not my wedding, and I'm not the highlight. Hahaha!

I'm going to school everyday to study. Little help, 'cause I still daydream my hours away, but at least that's better than staying at home. I'll youtube my hours away at home. -.- I'm so busy I don't even have time to talk to my bro after he came back from Cambodia, or look at those pics. Must be great, mission trips. I WANT TO GO TOO!!!! CGC, WHEN ARE WE GONNA GO TO CEBU AGAIN?????

A thought

2009-04-18T23:19:00.004+08:00

Quite a number of my girl friends are married/going to marry/with kids/going to have kids. As I read some of their blogs, it strikes me how they are so 幸福小女人. And I realize how I try to distance myself from being like that. I am not a feminist, but this whole idea of going ga-ga over having a baby, having a husband, or even getting married makes me shiver. (Do NOT get me wrong! I don't despise my girlfriends' lifestyle at all! I admire them and and am happy for them totally. I'm talking about my issue with myself.) I'm not sure if this whole marriage thing is for me really. I can't imagine having my own children, seeing how terrible many children around me are. Even Christian children. It's enough to deter me from having a family. But I'm not a feminist! I don't know what am I. Maybe I just prefer a life of being free from this sort of burden.

A sidenote: I finished the whole of my morphology and syntax essay (at least my part) with "Ben" playing over and over. Haha. Nice song. By MJ, back when he was black, normal, and a kid. Quite meaningful lyrics. Don't know about the movie, but the song is very nice. Look for the original MJ one, it's the nicest of all other renditions.

Wow

2009-04-13T14:30:00.002+08:00

The boldness to share the gospel is a gift. And I witness it today. :)

Rick Warren Controversy

2009-04-13T10:06:00.003+08:00

http://www.politico.com/news/stories/0409/21145.html

In the event that this is true, it is a great shame for Christians. Why do we feel ashame of our stand? It's worse to make a double statement than to be bashed by gay right activists for supporting prop 8. Now he has both gay right activists and prop 8 supporters' scorn.

It's a sad sad state of Christianity these days.

Thoughts that pop up as I drag myself through this day

2009-04-09T16:53:00.007+08:00

1) It's not that I don't want to contribute to the report, I am just not smart enough to do right such that it will save you from editing and editing.

2) I'm having a headache and it's all my fault. I really want to change my lifestyle. :(

3) Some friends are graduating. I will miss them! :(

4) Bro is going to Cambodia. So during weekdays it's gonna be an empty house again. Wonder why did I bother upgrading the broadband. No one uses it. And I want to visit a mission station too!

5) Am not looking forward to the exams. Am looking forward to the holidays. Can't leap across time though.

6) It feels horrible to be not smart enough / lazy.

7) I miss hanging out with friends. I miss freely joking and bantering with friends. I miss relaxing without worrying what unfinished work there is to do.

8) Eating dinner tonight with family to celebrate daddy's birthday early. Since Z will be in Cambodia on daddy's birthday.

9) The uncertainties of the Canada trip sucks.

10) If I'm going to Ottawa, I can see Colin Mochrie and Brad Sherwood perform!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOOOOOTZ!

God's Direction?

2009-03-31T23:28:00.001+08:00

I've applied for a teaching position and got rejected again. I wonder why? I always thought this is what I want to do, and can do pretty well in that. (Was it something I said during the interview?)

Anyway, now that this direction is blocked for the second time, I'm starting to wonder whether God has another intention for me. I'll just have to pray about it. Right now, I should just concentrate on my studies.

Christ Grace Church 20th Anniversary

2009-03-23T20:16:00.003+08:00

Here's to my spiritual family. Blessed 20th Anniversary. Thanks for the many encouragement, lessons, and spiritual nourishment for me ever since 1998. I would like to reiterate my conviction: I will not leave this church unless it has gone heretical (or I have become heretical). An additional conviction: Expect great things from God, attempt great things for God.

Childhood dream

2009-03-17T23:16:00.004+08:00

Man, do I miss acting. Only ever acted once in a class production. I thought I had my once in a lifetime dream. But now I miss it.

Look into the mirror and repeat after me

2009-03-12T15:38:00.001+08:00

I may not be smart in class, I may not understand the nuances of sociolinguistics, but I'm better somewhere else.

(Oh no, negative self talk.)

Hidden Beauty

2009-03-10T23:37:00.003+08:00

Le Luna glows at zenith
Its beauty hidden beyond the cold cemented roof
But shines the soft light of its glow
Spreads -gently- on the belly of thin, wispy clouds

From far, Sirius winks at me
Flirting, even, for attention as the brightest now
Somewhere other stars still gaze
Twinkling humbly, though not unprettily
Compensating brightness with mystery

Luna, clouds, and winking diamonds
Paint -unrandomly- an
awe-inducing
sigh-releasing
piece of art.
Each beautiful, yet each hides another's beauty.
But behold!
Their competition makes them lovelier! -
as they hint the mysterious greater beauty,
Of a universe
beyond our vision.

Comet Lulin

2009-03-08T00:19:00.007+08:00

Comet Lulin is visible now, in between Gemini and Cancer. But I haven't moved my backside to lug my tele or even my bino to take a look at it. I've been so lazy these few weeks. Projects and readings are piling way too high. Whenever I have the motivation to read, the reading is so difficult I grimace and go back to wasting time.

Oh man. Vicious cycle.

http://media.skyandtelescope.com/images/Lulin-Feb-2-by-Candy_556.jpg

On the bright side, I spotted Omega Centauri (NGC 5139) last week! It's a...erm...Globular Cluster. Don't ask my what it is. Wiki or google it. Haha.

Bomb behind my house

2009-03-03T23:14:00.004+08:00

WW2 relic found in the field behind my house, which used to be just forest with some colonial houses hidden within. I had been spying (hehe) since late afternoon with my bino, though I saw little dark green men (turns out to be the army people) crowding that area since morning.

And now that they mention it, I recall a police car pulling up at the construction site yesterday afternoon. So this was what it was about.

I also heard the loud "BOOM". Haha. A little highlight of the week. :)

More info here!

(You can tell how one's life is rather monotonous when one gets awfully excited over an unexploded bomb.)

Slumdog Millionaire

2009-02-27T23:33:00.007+08:00

The story of the two childhood sweethearts, their separation and their getting together again, is hopeful and endearing. As the film follows Jamal's life and the difficulties that he has to go through, our hearts wrench with him when Latika is left behind, and rejoice with him when he finds Latika again, wrench again when the are separated again, and so on. The casting choice is wonderful. According to an interview, the producer decided to cast the child, middle and grown actors with the same spirit instead of the same looks. This connects all the three different stages' actors into one united character of the innocent Jamal, lovely Latika, and streetsmart/punkish Salim. The kids are all very cute, to top it off. Towards the end, in true-blue Bollywood style, a crowd of people from the trains gather and dances. The only reason that makes this sequence non-cheesy and even beautiful is shots of Jamal and Latika as children dancing spiritedly in the same location - a reminder of this childhood sweetheart love story.

Overall, I think it deserved the 8 awards it won at the Oscar. Even Jai-Ho is an impressionable and lively soundtrack. Hollywood is not often graced by pure and innocent love stories.

Edit: I forgot to add that, the bond between the two brothers is touching, especially the elder to the younger, despite his betrayal in the middle.

Wanderlust

2009-02-25T23:18:00.002+08:00

Once in a while I will get this urge to travel. I love to travel, just never had much opportunity. And while I plough through everyday life, wanderlust hits me ever so suddenly.

Just a list of places I want to go (so far).

1) Ottawa (I hope my SEP gets through!)
2) New York, and especially to visit The Daily Show!
3) Eastern Europe (Afiah and Gwen!!!)
4) Tour the rest of America
5) Tour Canada
6) Western Europe

Snap back to reality: I have a test tomorrow. :(

Song crows

2009-02-20T22:45:00.004+08:00

Definitely not a heavenly choir, not really beautiful song birds either, But with a heart to sing the beautiful lyrics of O Holy Night for the unbelievers and believers in our Christmas Gospel Service 2007.

Pictures are from somewhere within our memories. We have since changed a lot - for better and worse.

Urgh...Sob

2009-02-16T01:12:00.002+08:00

"Ye have heard that it hath been said, An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth: But I say unto you, That ye resist not evil: but whosoever shall smite thee on thy right cheek, turn to him the other also. And if any man will sue thee at the law, and take away thy coat, let him have thy cloke also." - Matthew 5:38-40

I didn't expect that the lesson of meekness is so hard to learn. That, when one misunderstands you, you just have to bear it.

I've tried many times to explain to him why we broke up, yet till now he still blames me. What more can I do? He doesn't see the hand of God in this matter, perhaps only thinking about how hurt he feels. He didn't see that this relationship dishonours God and hence separation is necessary. He still dwells on how hurt he feels, how "shortchanged" he is...

I've tried explaining. I've tried swallowing my pride and accept whatever he said to me 2 thursdays ago, because I don't want to argue anymore and make it any more worse. Though we went home "in peace" and not in a huff, the next time I see him he's back to his bitter mode. I wish he hadn't said that he has "forgiven" or had that conversation 2 thursdays ago. At least I would not bear the false hope that we've taken a step towards civility.

It's hard to bear when he blames me for his condition now. Though I know that I did nothing wrong in choosing to break up, and though everyone will tell both him and me that it's no longer my fault, he still continues to imply/directly point his finger at me. His bitterness spills over to other areas of his/my life and I don't know how much more of his accusations can I take.

It feels terrible being misunderstood. He still cannot see my decision to break up as one that is made with much pain. Perhaps he thinks I'm dumping him out of my whims and fancies, and he hasn't heard a word of what I explained. And now I am made to feel as though I am to blame for his backsliding and reclusiveness.

I've come to a point where I've done all I could. Swallow my pride, put on a smile, whatever. I've come to a point any more explanations is futile and repetitive. I've come to a point I can only cry to God to vindicate me. And I know it may not be any time soon, or perhaps only in eternity, when he sees God in the judgement throne then God will let him understand. I just know I'm suppose to be meek now. And I pray that God will carry me through. Every trial is an opportunity to conform to the image of Christ. That's a well-spoken encouragement by one sister-in-Christ. For Christ Himself has suffered more dire accusations before. It's not impossible to do, being meek. I just need plenty of graces from God to carry me through.

When I said that 01.08.08 is the day I start to grow up, I didn't know - and still don't know - what sort of lessons comes with this growing-up.

Sigh.

Urgh

2009-02-15T21:40:00.002+08:00

It feels horrible to be misunderstood.

Global warming is real!

2009-02-14T19:49:00.001+08:00

The weather globe on my desktop says so! 34 degrees, seriously??

Charity (Love)

2009-02-14T19:33:00.005+08:00

This is perhaps my most meaningful V-day. Though I ain't really excited with v-days for 18 years before, had been slightly excited for 2 years before, now I'm back to being ambivalent, merely rolling eye balls at couples who wear identical shirts without thinking if they look dumb. Haha. Colour-coordinate, yes, but identical tees really look...erm...un-nice.

Today is meaningful because I challenged myself to show concern for someone, and not just in my heart. With much prayer for courage, I visited Mrs. Gan alone. I fear(ed?) because I was afraid of the language barrier, not knowing Hokkien and all, and I was afraid that it would end up with me trying my hardest to understand her and pretend to and end with awkward silence when she asked me a question that I didn't know I need to answer because I didn't understand what she said. I was also afraid of what I should say to her when I see her. But it's necessary to try to encourage an old lady like her, recently losed her husband, and now confined to a recuperating home. Pastor was saying that she might be struggling within her to go back to her old ways, so I just want to go see her, pray for her, and read some verses to her.

Thank the Lord that she looks better now, her colour is back. Thank the Lord for breaking tha language barrier, for she spoke clearly, and in mandarin too! I thank God for giving me the verses to read, and the words to pray.

So all in all, I think this must be the most meaningful v-day I've had so far.

Serving the Lord on v-day by leading teens in singing is meaningful too. =) I don't think you would be doing that if we are still in a relationship. That's why I believe it's best to be single so that time can be better spent. Hope you've had a blessed time.

Double Standards

2009-02-09T21:12:00.004+08:00

Oh the saga of MP Seng Han Tong who got attacked by ex-cabby driver and got set on fire. I'm appalled of course, because to set someone on fire is a hideos act. And the poor duno-which organisation's chairman who tried to put out the fire but ended up getting the fire on himself.

It is tragic to be so insecure in Singapore. No matter who, minister of parliament or not. Even if it had been some heavily-in-debt ah pek who got arson-ed, it's tragic.

But this is not what I want to talk about. Seriously, the government really has double standards for them and peasants like us. Senior Minister of State (Information, Communications and the Arts) Lui Tuck Yew scolded the whole online spheres for their their lack of self-regulation, hence allowing unkind and even evil remarks to be made by bloggers/commenters/anyone at all against Seng Han Tong. “[T]he vast majority were unhelpful, a significant number were unkind, a small number were downright outrageous" said he, and "It is a squandered opportunity for a higher degree of self-regulation. It would have been an example of the genesis, of the first steps, towards a more responsible, greater, self-regulatory regime.”

I definitely find people who touted MP Seng's tragedy as "deserving" absolutely revolting. But is it not hilarious that Lui Tuck Yew only came out to admonish the netsphere when an MP is the target of unkind comments?

I knew the unkindess of the internet long ago, right about when I boycotted Stomp for being downright stupid and childish, and - I won't be surprise - perhaps ruining other people's lives by posting untrue or exaggerated photographs and commentaries in Singapore Seen. Not to mention their encouragement of cowardice by allow people to snap passengers who don't give up seats, or put legs on seats, or whatever other stupid-as-poop things, hence relieving them the responsibilities of actually going up and telling people themselves. Seriously, sometimes the "culprit" in questions are old ladies or uncles, whom, for goodness sake, came from a culture vastly different than ours, and how intolerant are the young generations nowadays that they have to embarrass old folks for their "unmannered" behaviour? Mind you, if not for their hard work building Singapore up, you wouldn't have had the education you had and been so much more "cultured" than they are.

Phew! I digressed. Tons of steam accumulated for months.

As I was saying, internet is as internet is. Unkind remarks, or even downright childish and an embarrassment to nature have been floating around since the internet boom. But I guess R-Ad Lui couldn't be bothered since peasants can be picked on, humiliated online, and still go on with their pathetic little peasantry, but kings and princes must never be touched, or a rebellion would be triggered, a racial riot will ensue, and terrorists will bomb us, and whatever apocolyptic scenario he (and they) can pull out of their backside.

I don't condone the netizen's inflamatory remarks. My heart goes out to the burnt MP and Chairman for what has been done to them. But please, show that we are democratic and Singaporeans are at least equally human by scolding the net for reasons more than that which concerns your fellow princes.

For a better written post on this matter read here. http://www.sgpolitics.net/?p=2162

Steve Saint's quote

2009-02-01T00:27:00.003+08:00

Previously I blogged about the Quest of the Aucas. And I tried to remember what Steve (not Stephen) Saint said regarding his pain of losing his father, his aunt, and his daughter. I just reviewed the DVD and finally typed out the whole quote. Here is it.

I can tell you, for me, these are times, when as a little boy you were told that your daddy was never coming home. When as [an] approaching middle age man your aunt Rachel who so dear to you, and such a time when so many things that you hold dear, is gone. And...and you have to participate in putting the shell into a hole in the ground. And then even more so when …when my only daughter is suddenly, beyond my control, taken out of my protective custody. Those are times when you don’t posture, and I can tell you honestly that this hope that is within me is not something that I aspire to it; something that is very, very, real. It doesn’t take the pain and anguish away, but it smoothes this… this comforting balm over, that I know will make it heal. The hole will never fill in as long as I live here – these precious ones that we’ve lost – but there aren’t jagged and raw edges either. There’s this…there’s this emptiness, that I have a hope inside me that knows that it would be filled again.

ROFLOL! - Lim's Arts and Living

2009-01-31T22:46:00.001+08:00

"And Lim’s Art & Living? Hahahahahhahaha. Dude! The full name of the shop is
“I am Mr Lim and I make a Living passing these things off as Art to Ang Mohs…
Pte Ltd”."

Mr. Miyagi is so funny! HAHAHAHAHAH! http://miyagi.sg/2008/07/their-man-in-singapore/

Will Wilberforce flip in his grave?

2009-01-30T01:03:00.006+08:00

"Yet the Darwin-Wedgwood maxim made the slave a "Man and a Brother". Darwin opened his first evolution notebook in 1837, damned slave-holders for their separate species view, then pushed common parentage to the zoological limit." -BBC

In their book, Adrian Desmond and James Moore argue that Charles Darwin, father of evolution, invented his theory due to his anti-slavery conviction. Darwin was, argued Desmond and Moore, against the slavers' idea that the blacks were of an inferior species, and hence he sought to forward that all man are decendents of the same species. Thus his evolution idea that all man decended from the same microb was borned.

Factual level aside, I can't help but be amused/bemused by the whole irony of this thing. The father of anti-slavery, William Wilberforce, is known to forward that men are created equal and hence slavery is the trade of brutes. His conviction stemmed from his believe in God, and his strength for his anti-slavery fight came from the very fact that he was a devoted Christian and passionate servant of God, and would not tolerate such injustice to be performed by a country that on an official level, honoured God.

If, suppose, that Darwin had shared that same passion at the injustice, and love for the fellowman, he wrote out of a true heart to want to topple slavers' ridiculous notion that the blacks are of an inferior species. Isn't it ironic that his evolution, borned out of his love for his fellowman, is anti-God, while on the other hand, Wilberforce, whose anti-slavery fight was also borned out of his love for his fellowman, loved God? How utterly ironic that one who fathered an anti-God doctrine should father it out of a passion stirred by a man who loved God and wanted God's justice to be mete.

I wonder how Wilberforce will feel.

In any case, the simple doctrine that all man are decendents of Adam and Eve is enough to overthrow the slavers' ignorance. There is absolutely no need for Darwin and his anti-God doctrine to overthrow the myth.

Information gotten from http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/science/nature/7856157.stm.

新年过了

2009-01-27T21:52:00.005+08:00

Another round of Lunar New Year! Came and went.

Reunion dinner with my favourite dishes!

Niece and nephews

There was a solar eclipse on day 1 of CNY.

As you can see from the photos, I ain't very close with my relatives. Mostly we just went there. The parents would talk to their siblings, but my brother and I would be watching TV. Some cousins are closer to one another, but not with me. So overall it's pretty boring. Not that I mind, I still like to see my relatives, I ain't avoiding them. And of course the ang baos!!! =)

Many goodies still left in my home. Anyone cares to visit and eat them up? Hehe.

新年

2009-01-27T13:38:00.001+08:00

You told my mom you'll come visit on Chinese New Year but you didn't.

Why are we still so awkward? I miss talking to you.

Lunar New Year kuah

2009-01-20T23:16:00.005+08:00

It's that time of the year, and I made some Kueh Makmur again! Suppose to make love letters too but my mom's friend gave her a big tin of it she said we don't need to make them anymore. :(

Here goes the pics!

It was tiring but fun. And the taste is totally worth it. :P

For the past few CNYs, I would give you a small box of the goodies I made. Mostly they were for your family, but you always ended up eating them. -.- I remember how we will also buy bak kuas for each other's family. You also don't have the habit of buying new clothes for CNY, and Valentine's day being so close to CNY I used to buy shirts for you for Vday for CNY, and you the same for me. This year I guess you'll be wearing your old clothes again.

Ecclesiastes

2009-01-19T01:08:00.007+08:00

My favourite portion from Ecclesiastes, appended below.

Any self proclaimed philosopher, or any one interested in philosophy, should read the book of Ecclesiastes in the Bible. Solomon, one blessed with the gift of wisdom, philosophiesed about life in this book. My particular favourite is Ecclesiastes 3, ever since I heard it read in Chinese.

Or if you're that lazy, listen to this:

Jehovah is love

2009-01-19T00:26:00.003+08:00

When I am down, God my Heavenly Father always reminds me that He is with me. Thank God that He adopted me through the Lord Jesus Christ, or else I wouldn't have such a wonderful omnipotent and omniscient Father, who knows what I need and leads me along.

《耶和华是爱》

耶和华是爱

让我安歇青草溪水边

神令我省察心中的幽暗共度每一天

耶和华是爱

在困境中他保守引领

神为我摆设丰盛的恩典

再危难也不改变

在世间主恩与共

他的爱常在我身边

神为我施恩惠保守勉励

共同度此生

耶和华是爱

让我安歇青草溪水边

无限满足快乐涌自心田

再危难也不改变

《野地的花》

野地的花，穿著美麗的衣裳，

天空的鳥兒，從來不為生活忙。

慈愛的天父，天天都看顧，

祂更愛世上人，為他們預備永生的路。

一切需要，天父已經都知道，

若心中煩惱，讓祂為你除掉。

慈愛的天父，天天都看顧，

祂是全能的主，信靠祂的人真是有福。

Moral Home and Mrs. Gan

2009-01-11T22:33:00.003+08:00

I enjoy serving the Moral Home folks at Labrador Park on second Sundays. It's firstly a joy to watch and learn from Deacon Tan to see how he serves these folks. Also, their simple faith makes me wonder and marvel.

Particularly, the first few times when we started to bring them out to Labrador park for our monthly small service, Margaret had been very grumpy, often scolding and complaining. Once I heard her talk about her bitter experience with her mother and scolding her mother as she recounted to Deacon Tan. The next month however, by the grace of God, she came happy and smiling. She apologised for her behaviour on the previous month. And now, very often she is so joyful to come for the little worship we have. Often apologising at very little things, and eager to sing hymns.

It's wonderful to serve the Lord. It's wonderful to see God changing lives of people. So many people whose lives the Lord saved and changed. All in His intricate means which we do not and cannot predict.

Talking about God's ways. Today in Sunday school we started the introductory to systematic theology. Pastor Joseph says that one of the necessity of learning theology is that we may apply it to our lives and know what is right and wrong to do. On this, he mentioned how he was discussing with Uncle Thiam Ann how to break the news to Mrs Gan on Thursday night (for details read the previous post). Theology teach us what is the role of husband and wife, and necessitates that Mrs Gan as Mr Gan's wife need to learn the truth. The Bible taught them what is right to do, so they must do it. What is left then is to pray that God would prepare her Mrs. Gan. So, they spent half an hour praying over this matter.

Praise the Lord! That very night God prepared her heart. It was that very night that she learned, from the Lord Himself, that her husband is now with Jesus.

How great Thou art, LORD!

O Lord my God! When I in awesome wonder
Consider all the works Thy hands have made.
I see the stars, I hear the rolling thunder,
Thy power throughout the universe displayed.

Refrain:
Then sings my soul, my Saviour God, to Thee;
How great Thou art, how great Thou art!
Then sings my soul, My Saviour God, to Thee:
How great Thou art, how great Thou art!

Exceeding abundantly above all that we can ask or think! -Eph 3:20

2009-01-10T01:33:00.001+08:00

The greatest worry of Mr. Gan's sudden passing is mostly likely how to break the news to Mrs. Gan, who is still recuperating from her stroke. Ever since she was hospitalised, the couple have been crying and tearing, perhaps worrying about Mrs. Gan's condition or missing each other terribly. Either way, it is obvious to everyone their deep flowing affection for each other, making the breaking of such bad news a heavy burden hanging on everyone's shoulders.

Knowing that it will be cruel to keep it from her and not to let her see her husband for the last time, the family together with some of the church people ventured prayerfully to tell her the news this (Friday) afternoon in the hospice. Who knew that the LORD has already prepared her heart! As the group converse and slowly approach the topic, finally pastor told her plainly that Mr. Gan was gone. She, the grace of God abounding in her, told everyone calmly that she knew that "he is with Jesus" already!

God's thought is not man's thought. God's way is not man's way. Who can ever expect the LORD's mercy and His gracious hand working in this matter! Thank the Lord for answering our prayer. Thank the Lord for comforting Mrs. Gan! Thank the Lord that it is precisely because our glorified Mr. Gan is in heaven that gives such peace that surpass our understanding in each one of our hearts, particulary Mrs. Gan's!

"Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and shew thee great and mighty things, which thou knowest not." - Jeremiah 33:3

"And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to [his] purpose." - Romans 8:28

Goodbye Mr. Gan. In the sweet by and by, we shall meet on that beautiful shore.

May God work in the hearts of every unbeliever who was at the funeral service, that they may praise the LORD and accept the Lord Jesus Christ as their Saviour!

New Year Post

2009-01-05T00:01:00.009+08:00

As usual, my new year post is always delayed. I suppose I'm not someone who sits and contemplates new year resolutions on the 31st of December every year. It comes to me when I already stepped into the new year, embracing the changes and seeing the world around me move forward. Then my mindset will follow it.

What can I say about 2008? It's the year I turned 21, a milestone set by whoever to mark your step into adulthood. How true - for it is this year that I learnt a great life lesson that brought me to another level of maturity (really?) and self discovery.

The beginning of 2008 was pretty dull. The usual schooling, except my birthday bbq planning towards the end of the semester. Then came my birthday, and one of the most wonderful and thoughtful gift I received is the telescope from elf . Lots of money and effort and thoughts on his part. And, also, a gift that caused my many moments of sighs and regrets even now.

And then the separation - perhaps the most painful experience I have yet. And on my adulthood milestone too... I experienced an emotional turmoil I never did before - not even that "emo" period during secondary 4 when my rebellious nature was suppressed by God and brought me to personal knowledge of Him. No - this pain digs deeper into the heart, and with the separation the tearing away of a part of my heart. "The wounds will never go away...", I recall from a previous testimony (here).

Shama said the breakup will make me realise what I really want in a relationship. And it's true. I know what my weakness is now, and what I don't wish to see in a relationship. I know what I want in a man and what sort of man can I submit to as a wife. I know how un-ready I am to be committed in a relationship, and what are my shortcomings. I know what needs to be done in a relationship, before and during. And the most important lesson I learnt from God is to wait upon Him, and not to sin adamently during the course of the relationship. I learnt, with sorrow, that sin brings forth only bad fruit. Before we both realise it, God decided that we've displeased Him enough.

The post separation period was hard. The road to recovery was tough. I soon fell into escapism in what seems a harmless recreation - movies. The addiction for catharsis and escape brought my life and discipline to a halt, and I soon found myself in a heap of mess - missed deadlines, sloppy assignments, slothfulness in the work of God. Even the sweet devotion time with the Lord every night was sacrificed, and I walked further and further away from my Shepherd.

People often ask how do I know God exists. I know because He does. And at that stage of my life I felt His presence the most. Though I escaped from Him He never left me. His presence was ever so real. In my self inflicted melancholy I felt His frowning countenance, and His loving hand. He knew exactly when do I need afflictions and reminders, and He knew when exactly do I need encouragement and comfort. He gave me problems that forced me to pray and realise my utter helplessness. He gave me hymns and bible verses that reminded me of how much I used to love Him. How do I know He's real? Because He's my heavenly Father. "The wounds will never go away, but somehow there's this balm that smoothens all the rough and jagged ends."

And so slowly I recovered, and very recently too. The church camp this year could be the mark of my decisivness to return to Him and aim to serve Him with all my heart again. I'm still trudging back to be in step with Him, but now I'm filled with joy more than my earthly sorrow. I look back at the relationship, knowing full well that we both caused our own demise by our adament sin. We both caused our own death by not basing this relationship on God. I pray for God's forgiveness, and I thank Him for separating us before we walk the path of no return.

I thank God for preserving my parents thus far. My father losed his job twice in 2008, but found another again. I got accepted for an exchange programme to Canada, and I'm praying for God's provision and guidance on that. I pray I'm doing according to His wish and His will, that I may learn and see more and gain experiences that would make me a better person in my 5 month stay there in 2009. But if it should be more of a distraction, and a hinderance to the church's work (already we have so little people), then I pray God may make it clear to me to forfeit this trip.

2009 will see changes in the church as well. Binqiang and Felicia will be married, hence a new stage in life. Hopefully they will be stregthened to greater love and service towards the Lord.

Eliel will be studying and working. Knowing him, he'll overburn himself. Need to pray for him.

Robin will have responsibilities, I pray that he'll grow in love and service towards God.

Shaojuan needs plenty of prayer and encouragement (and a bit of stronger words perhaps?) to wake her up from finding pleasure in this world. I thank God for her constantly pledging allegience to Christ, and I pray that she may overcome her own flesh to love God with all her heart.

Pastor Joseph is busy as usual, hopefully and prayerfully, he may change a job.

Pastor James is hoping to see revival. I pray that it may be the burden of the whole church and our constant prayer. Not for ourselves, but that we may dare to "expect great things from God, attempt great things for God".

As for me, I hope to break out of my fear. The fear of man that so shut my mouth from reaching out to my friends and especially (guiltily) my family. I pray that I may take the first step before I leave for Canada.

Of course, in earthly matters: to pull up my CAPS (God gave me the dip that I deserved, to wake me up from my stupor), to be more prudent with my money, and to be a better daughter and sister at home.

"For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end." - Jeremiah 29:11

Be Thou my vision O Lord of my heart
Naught be all else to me save that Thou art
Thou my best thought by day or by night
Waking or sleeping Thy presence my light.

Riches I heed not nor man's empty praise
Thou my inheritance now and always
Thou and Thou only first in my heart
High King of heaven my treasure Thou art.

It has been 1 semester...

2008-12-05T23:08:00.003+08:00

This is the first semester spent without you around. I don't know how different it has been. Lonelier definitely, especially when I go for my astronomy lecture. All the facts I learnt about the planets, and especially the telescope, I wished so much to share with you. If you had been with me I would definitely asked you to crash lecture with me, just to share my fascination.

I've been walking home from school more regularly this semester. My stamina has kinda increased a little, cos I didn't perspire as much as before already. If you were still around you would have asked me to walk more, or run, and then I'll get annoyed with you cos you're nagging again.

My loneliest moment is still the exam period. I miss having you beside me while I studied. I did appreciate you coming down all the way, with nothing to do, just to accompany me while I studied. I appreciated it before - it's just that I appreciate a lot more now. And when I'm dozing off you'll ask me to take power naps and wake me up later. When I get tired you'll rub my neck because I've been looking down so often. I couldn't go to the benches this sem cos there's no one to take care of my stuff (hehe). And I thank you for running all across to the engineering to get dinner - my chicken mcnuggets. =) Despite not going out on movies and stuff you still had to spend so much money.

I wouldn't say that my studies weren't affected because of what happened. 'Cause I ended up indulging in movies so as not to think about it - and I just got lazy and too addicted to watching movies after that. I've almost missed deadlines so many times, and mostly my work are last minute. I think my grades will suffer this semester. I just thank God at least I didn't have a full breakdown.

In the past you didn't like me to leave for overseas, so I didn't sign up for SEP. I've decided to try signing up now. And I got it. I'm wondering whether I should go. If you were here you would definitely say no. But I really love te experience new things. And we will get into a fight - again.

Uni life is different without you. It has been 2 years with you; the next 2 years is up to me now.

Thanks for the wonderful 2 years though.

2 more days to go!

2008-12-02T01:52:00.003+08:00

2 more days till exam's over.

Right now, Spolsky and Cooper are floating all over my head.

I Don't Want to Live on the Moon

2008-11-26T20:07:00.002+08:00

Yes I've always express my desire to fly to the moon, especially when I'm down. But I guess at the end of the day, I'll sing what Ernie sang.

The moon is still a beautiful getaway though. I still love the moon!

And I love Ernie! =D

'Tis the blessed hour of prayer

2008-11-23T22:56:00.002+08:00

So many posts today, 'cos I have alot of thoughts flying through my mind now.

'Tis the Blessed Hour of Prayer

’Tis the blessèd hour of prayer, when our hearts lowly bend,
And we gather to Jesus, our Savior and Friend;
If we come to Him in faith, His protection to share,
What a balm for the weary, O how sweet to be there!

Blessèd hour of prayer, blessèd hour of prayer,
What a balm for the weary, O how sweet to be there!

’Tis the blessèd hour of prayer, when the Savior draws near,
With a tender compassion His children to hear;
When He tells us we may cast at His feet every care,
What a balm for the weary, O how sweet to be there!

Blessèd hour of prayer, blessèd hour of prayer,
What a balm for the weary, O how sweet to be there!

’Tis the blessèd hour of prayer, when the tempted and tried
To the Savior Who loves them their sorrow confide;
With a sympathizing heart He removes every care;
What a balm for the weary, O how sweet to be there!

Blessèd hour of prayer, blessèd hour of prayer,
What a balm for the weary, O how sweet to be there!

At the blessèd hour of prayer, trusting Him, we believe
That the blessing we’re needing we’ll surely receive;
In the fullness of the trust we shall lose every care;
What a balm for the weary, O how sweet to be there!

Blessèd hour of prayer, blessèd hour of prayer,
What a balm for the weary, O how sweet to be there!

I remember at the peak of my zeal I prayed a lot, and those times were truly blessed hour of prayer. When you talk knowing that God hears you, and all the burden you carry just falls off your shoulders, those times you can just kneel there forever and talk to Him increasing in peace and joy as you speak. There are times where you have to do something right, and you know that you can pray and ask for strength and He freely gives you strength to overcome your weaknesses. Those times are so sweet.

Now my prayers are full of begging for forgiveness and removal of sins, asking Him to bring me back to Him again. Though it's still sweet, 'cos you can talk to God still through Jesus, but the pain that you have to go through by going through your sins - the bittersweet of both confessing your sins and knowing God has forgiven them and the anguish at why you even sinned at the first place.

Quest For The Aucas 2

2008-11-23T22:49:00.002+08:00

Continued from the previous post on the Aucas missionary:

After the death of the five martyrs, one's son, Stephen Saint, came into the midst of them to live with them, together with his wife and children. He was baptised by the now converted Aucas who once speared his father, and whom are also his spiritual elders now. After living among them, he had to endure yet another pain of losing his daughter (diseases I think).

One line he said that moved me to tears, not in verbatim:

There was a time when I was a young boy, who was told that his father is never coming home...and to endure the passing of the aunt that was so important to you...and to lose your only daughter...The wounds will never go away, but somehow there's this balm that smoothens all the rough and jagged ends.

I wish I have his faith.

Be Still My Soul

2008-11-23T22:45:00.001+08:00

http://www.cyberhymnal.org/htm/b/e/bestill.htm

Be still, my soul: the Lord is on thy side.
Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain.
Leave to thy God to order and provide;
In every change, He faithful will remain.
Be still, my soul: thy best, thy heavenly Friend
Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end.

Be still, my soul: thy God doth undertake
To guide the future, as He has the past.
Thy hope, thy confidence let nothing shake;
All now mysterious shall be bright at last.
Be still, my soul: the waves and winds still know
His voice Who ruled them while He dwelt below.

Be still, my soul: when dearest friends depart,
And all is darkened in the vale of tears,
Then shalt thou better know His love, His heart,
Who comes to soothe thy sorrow and thy fears.
Be still, my soul: thy Jesus can repay
From His own fullness all He takes away.

Be still, my soul: the hour is hastening on
When we shall be forever with the Lord.
When disappointment, grief and fear are gone,
Sorrow forgot, love’s purest joys restored.
Be still, my soul: when change and tears are past
All safe and blessèd we shall meet at last.

Be still, my soul: begin the song of praise
On earth, believing, to Thy Lord on high;
Acknowledge Him in all thy words and ways,
So shall He view thee with a well pleased eye.
Be still, my soul: the Sun of life divine
Through passing clouds shall but more brightly shine.

Sigh

2008-11-18T21:02:00.003+08:00

Previously, in the midst of my exams, we quarrelled again. I asked u to leave me alone for a while. The next day you came by my school with Starbucks mocha and a choc muffin u bought especially from Holland V. I took it, we talked a bit more, then we quarrelled again. Instead of asking you to stay you had to turn around and leave.

I enjoyed your coffee and muffin. I'm sorry. I'm really sorry.

Quest For The Aucas

2008-11-16T23:15:00.003+08:00

Today at Pastor Joseph's house, we watched this Christian DVD on the late missionaries in Ecuador, titled Quest For The Aucas. (Click here for info.)

In January 1956, five young men ventured into the forbidden territory of the
Waodani (Aucas), one of the world’s most feared people groups. Jim Elliot, Nate
Saint, Ed McCully, Roger Youderian, and Pete Fleming, five young men in the
prime of their lives, sought to bring the love and light of Jesus Christ to a
stone-age people who had never heard the good news. But their mission ended
tragically, a saga made famous by the books Through Gates Of Splendor and Jungle
Pilot.

The Aucas were feared because of their savagery of killing - outside and even within their family. They were also people who believed in taking revenge. Spearing others for vengence, according to the DVD, was common.

The missionaries who went there went with the resolution to give their lives for this mission. And when they were killed - martyred - they truly lived up to their resolution. What's truly magnificent about their death is how they, though armed, did not retaliate, because they promised God that while they brought rifles to scare away the villagers, they would never shoot one of them. And so they died, speared by the Aucas who were afraid of their rifles.

One part of the show is Rachel Saint, sister of one of the martyr, recalling what she said to one of the spearers after they killed her brother. When he told her that they speared them because they thought the missionaries were going to use the rifle to kill them, she said that, no, they promised God not to kill anyone. The idea of love that sacrificial was so foreign to the Aucas, that when that Auca heard that, he trembled and shook really hard...

And then, the most powerful of all, is how the sister and the wife (or wives) of these martyred then stayed in that village and continued their work - living among their loved ones' killers, loving them, teaching them the word of God. The best proof of love among those foreign to the idea of sacrifice.

So now, the people who once speared these missionaries are saved, they are pastors in the Aucas church. They baptised the son of one of the missionaries who died in their hands and became his spiritual elder.

The hand of God is so real, so powerful. There is not human who can love their enemies to that extent unless they first have the love of the Lord Jesus Christ in them. There is no greater love than that of Christ which is able to let them forgive their enemies, and convert the savage heart to a loving heart.

Be Thou my Vision

2008-11-12T14:29:00.005+08:00

Isn't it great that God still strife with you when you're in spiritual low, or when you are adamently in sin? He knocks at your heart, He speaks to you in different ways, even though you don't respond to Him, He continues to do so. He gives you no peace, your life is in a mess that you yourself made and He did not just take them away cause He wants you to look at your own mess and say "This is how my life is without God". But He keeps striving with you, struggling with you, sometimes He chastises, sometimes he encourages, but everytime He never leave you alone.

That's why I know I'm saved. That's why I know I'm His. And that's why even though I'm in deep mess and my life is in shambles I ask God "why" but I know why. I may be upset and at times frustrated at why God allow some things to happen in my life, but I still know that He knows His plans for me and He knows what He is doing. So I can still smile - deep down in my heart.

Lord, please don't stop striving with me if I fail you again and again...

Be Thou my vision O Lord of my heart

Naught be all else to me save that Thou art

Thou my best thought by day or by night

Waking or sleeping Thy presence my light.

Riches I heed not nor man's empty praise

Thou my inheritance now and always

Thou and Thou only first in my heart

High King of heaven my treasure Thou art.

2008 Presidential Elections

2008-11-05T01:46:00.001+08:00

Ok. I'm not an American, and I've not carefully studied the candidates' policies vis a vis America's economy and culture and political climate and everything. So whatever I've said is purely my own personal opinion that is inconsequential.

So I like Obama. He addressed the issue of race frankly and artfully, acknowledging the african americans' still existing anger amoung some of them because of oppression acted on them in the past, and the whites also are angry that there are extra benefits awarded on the african americans because of their oppression in history. He did not think that it is realistic to say America is now past the racial divide, neither is his presidency (if) going to change much of that. But he wants to work towards greater tolerance.

That's one.I

n an earlier speech on religion and governance, he addressed why he will not impose christian rules and laws on america politics. He acknowledges the fact that America is now secularise, and when the president presides, he/she is not presiding over christians, but atheists, free-thinkers, buddhists, muslims, etc. So if he wants to enact a law, he has to consider whether the other religions can find grounds in enacting that law too. Furthermore, if christian laws are to be enforced, whose type will it be? Will it be the old testament laws, where certain seafood are illegal, or according to which denominations' directions?

I'm a fundamental Christian, and I don't agree with abortions and gay marriages. But I agree with the Westminster Confession in the separation of church and state. The president cannot act as a christian alone, but has now become the boss of many many other religions whom, even according to the Bible, that we don't stone alive and expel them from the face of the world. We lament, we pray against immorality, but in governing multi religious country definately the leader will have to allow rights of other religions.

Furthermore, US's Christianity is unique in the sense that it has been and now still is very much tied to politics, simply because America was founded by Christians. While we Christians from Singapore will not understand the extent of such dynamics, we should not quickly associate Republicans as good Christians and Democrats and liberal/bad/non christians. If anything, Republicans believe in gun possession, do we believe in that? The culture of Singapore shapes our views that holding arms is unnecessary. Off shore drilling, tax cuts for the rich, war in iraq, which of these are Biblical? They may, they may not, and we'll have to have a whole book written on each of Republican's policies to understand whether or not they are biblical. Democrats' policies are seldom biblical, but they are do include rights of minorities and environmental policies and greater wealth sharing for the poor.

But the bottomline is, we should not link politics to religion, because politics are politics. They are unstable, and may all be outright lies and panderings. Politicians pander to bases in order to earn votes. So when McCain visits a Christian university, he's not seeking God, he's pandering to Christians. George Bush is suppose to be christians, but his presidency is hardly successful and his judgement is highly questionable. It does not mean that as long as one is a christian one can do well in all things, presidency included.

I think i'm writing this because I don't like the idea of supporting one party because they are commonly associated with conservatism/liberalism, and liberal = bad = not good president. Don't get me wrong, i'm conservative. But it's a whole different ball game to be a conservative POLITICAL party in amercia. You can't equate that with being biblical and godly.

On the other hand, with efforts now to save my butt in future, i cannot guarentee Obama is going to be a wonderful president. He may be bad, he may be like bush, or he may be the last president of the united states. But politics always play out differently than the election period. It's almost unfair to say voters of the other person should have seen that coming when they voted for one president. I don't think Bush's voters knew that he'll turn back on whatever he has said in his 2000 campaign and become the person that he is, and neither can you blame them for his presidency now.In any case, let politics play out as politics. Let religion be removed from it.

On our part, we can only pray for God's will to be done, and in this last days, that perhaps America would be spared from facing apolyptical crisis.

HELP

2008-10-30T01:04:00.003+08:00

I should be fleshing out my essay now, but as usual, I procrastinate and hand up crappy work which I will regret for a day and forget about it and regret again when my results come back. But here I am, blogging. Just want to heave a big

SIGH

Oh I don't know. So many things have happened/are happening lately. I wish things are simpler, throw back to a simpler time when people around me are happy. I guess when the going gets tough it makes it worse to be at a spiritual low at the same time.

I know God keeps knocking on my heart, and I'm too lazy to make the effort to open it. I guess I'm in deep crap right now - spiritual and secular. I hope I'll recover soon.

AH...

YES YES THERE IS!

2008-09-01T23:14:00.002+08:00

Haha!!! In reply to my previous post, there is! Mary Tang! LOL. She picked up my monkey after I left it in class that day. =D Oh man oh man I'm so happy~!! And thankful to God~!

I'm so sorry that I prayed in a complainy tone. Sorry I hadn't had the faith to trust You or and contentment for my lot! Thank You thank You for answering my prayer!!

Oh dear...I am still very thankful and happy right now. God is so good! Truely thank God for that. =D

Looking back at that post, I was so self-righteous~! I think that I deserve good things to happen to me because I've done good things. I shouldn't have took pride in returning others their stuff - that's what is normal to do~! And how about the thoughts of keeping them to myself - oh dear these can be known by God - so I still bore sinful thoughts in my heart. OH MAN~ In the fit of anxiousness I puffed up like a pharisee~! :( Sorry.................

Oh man I'm happy! MY MONKEY!

Don't like that leh...

2008-09-01T10:19:00.004+08:00

Whenever I find something, I'll try my best to return it to the owner. But it doesn't seem to happen when I lost something.

Last year I lost my brother's hp. In a toilet cubicle. Someone took it and purposefully turned it off so that I cannot contact her.

A few days after I found a phone, an expensive one, on the bus. Having felt the sense of loss from my hp experience I tried calling up the contacts. And finally delayed going off to somewhere just to pass it to the owner.

Another time I found a phone in the playground. Waited till very late with my friend just to locate the owner (by calling the contacts again.)

Then there was another time, I found a $70+ (or was it $17?) valued cashcard. I was very tempted to take it, cos I was about to print something in large qty. But I left a postit note there just so that the person can contact me.

***

I lost my phone someone purposefully took it. I lost my blazer (on the bus) and it was lost forever too. And now this. It's very likely that I lost it in school. SO WHY DIDN'T ANYONE RETURN IT???

Is there no kind ones around anymore??????? =...(

Our Solar System - Evidence for Creationism

2008-08-18T00:44:00.002+08:00

Click on the links to go to part 2 and above.

It so marvelous how great God is. I really cannot believe how anyone can not believe in a Creator - and I'm not even talking about religions. Just the fact that you are not randomly formed by rocks and gas - even that there are people who say no to it. (And strangely enough some of them read their horoscopes religiously...)

I cannot put it better in words than this guy. God is the Creator, and He is creative and appreciates beauty. Please pour through the 1 hour plus long video. It's totally worth your time.

"For the invisible things of him from the creation of the world are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even his eternal power and Godhead; so that they are without excuse:" - Romans 1:20

Because it's the right thing to do

2008-08-11T01:11:00.002+08:00

It's very painful, I know. But it's the right thing to do, so you gotta keep on it.

From the very start it was not done properly. You did not wait for the Lord's timing. And so when the foundation is shaky, everything else you build on cannot last. As you keep building, you made mistakes, and you tried to glue the mistakes as you go along.

But that's not how it should be done. The best way, in this case at least, is to take everything apart and rebuild again. At least - when you finally know how to, or if you should even build at all.

It's great heartache. It's unlike common breakups. Because this is not the result of a quarrel. It's not because you don't love each other anymore. But you know right now, at your stage, you are too immature to handle the heat of the friction that occurs when you become so close to someone. You are not experienced in life yet. You are not ready to commit. You are not ready to submit. You have too much pride.

So this is the right thing to do - before all these arguments and quarrels finally wear out any affection between you. This is right because all these friction is tearing apart the testimony you've been building all these years for your family members. It is the right thing to do because you need the distance and time to understand what is God's will. Maybe this time round you'll learn to wait upon the Lord.

"And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose." - Romans 8:28

This is true. You still have God. And that's enough. Remember that the love of Christ is more than sufficient for anyone. Companionship is a matter of God's will for individuals. Remember that no matter how impossible things may seem now, God shall surely bring something to pass as long as it's in His will. If it's not, then there's no point for you to hold on to it either - it'll end in disaster.

So wait upon the Lord. Things will get alright. Things will be better. Just do what is right to do.

God will take care of you.

Weird feeling all over again

2008-07-26T00:26:00.001+08:00

It's strange how you get to know people just before you have to leave. All of a sudden, ending work doesn't seem like such a joyous occasion.

I'm so "emo" nowadays.

"And miles to go before I sleep"

2008-07-16T16:20:00.001+08:00

Have been working for one and a half months now. I’ve learned many new things, especially about financial planning, organizing, calling up people etc. My bosses are rather nice people, they don’t have the “air” of bosses which I know some other managers do. My pay seems a little low compared to another part time PA who works lesser hours than me. Haha. Ah wells. But nevermind. Boss 1 teaches me many things slowly and patiently, but he doesn’t feedback whether what I did was right or wrong, or what do I need to improve in. This kinda bugs me because I will never know whether I did something right or not. I don’t want my bosses to have this bad impression of me and I don’t even know what is wrong. So far so good. Colleagues aren’t that bad either. Most of them are pretty friendly.

Suddenly the issue of income and work seems important. I never really did care about them in the past. It’s not that I’ve become money-minded now, it’s just the idea that I really need to plan where and how much will my money come from, and how should I save or spend them. And then you start getting this impending doom that your money is not enough. I don’t know whether that is considered before over worried in the unhealthy way or not. I just wish I know what really to do (NO, financial advisors, I don’t need you to contact me. I already have a few F.A friends. Thank you.)

And then when the end of the year comes, I’ll be faced with the dilemma of whether or not to continue teaching in the tuition centre. I really don’t want to continue teaching maths, or primary school English. I want to teach GP, especially writing essays. I don’t know whether I’ll be up to it but I prefer to do that than to drill grammars to a large group of kids. But then, without the centre, will I still be able to get students myself?

I can’t wait for school to start. I’m such a nerd – I wanna study again. The modules I want to take seems interesting. But I know when school really starts I would want it to end soon. Hehe. Human lah~

Decisions, decisions, decisions. It seems like I kept asking and asking and there’s no answer what I should do. Sometimes this seems right, other times that seems fine too. Like SJ who always ask me whenever she has troubles in her life, I want to ask, “Isn’t it great if God can still talk to us.” I mean directly.

Life at crossroad, here begins a phase, there ends another. Just got to keep moving, over another ditch, over another sign.

“And miles to go before I sleep,

And miles to go before I sleep.”

Busy Busy Vacation

2008-06-18T00:09:00.002+08:00

To my horrors, my last post is more than 1 month ago, while I was still struggling with my papers. Well, my results are out already, and with S/U, I just managed to keep my CAPS. Not exactly where I want it, but you can't complain if you don't deserve it.

Several things happened. Some huge some not so huge. Let's go chronologically.

1) 21st BIRTHDAY!!
I'm legally an adult now! This year's birthday was celebrated in a little over the top fashion - at least for a person like me. I had a bbq (a party of sorts) which I invited friends from different walks of my 21 years of life. Swiss, JJ, Uni, church... It wasn't spectacular fun, just good food (ezb!) and quiet West Coast Park. Spent a bomb. Not sure if it was worth it. It's like the time when I went for Prom and bought a costly gown which I won't ever put that on again - just a moment of vainity. But well, it's still a great time meeting up with old friends (and make new ones!) For photos, go to my facebook!

I also got many other presents. =) Nothing beats sincerity, and you know sincerity; it may not have evidences, but you can feel it.

This year elf also spent a HUGE - and I mean HUGE - bomb on celebrating my 21st. (All I did for elf is a $90 wallet and NYDC...) Went to Sentosa and took many different rides, many of which expensive and short - just because I love to see views from up high. Plus - and this is the best - I GOT A REAL TELESCOPE! Real one! Not those you find in supermarket. It's close to xxxx (I don't think he wants me to say, but just know that it's too much for him even if he's working). And all these because I just started to know more about the celetial sphere through GEK15somethingsomething (Heavenly Mathematics module), and my neverending desire to see the sky in its glory since youth. I love my Celestron, but I have such woefully short time to spend with it. Not to mention that the things worth seeing are BEYOND MY SIGHT from my balcony. Cry.

Oh! And I had my FIRST and indeed very surprising birthday surprise! Shaojuan and elf lah... First SJ asked me out on 12th May afternoon for lunch - sort of like a celebration for me. Ok we went Sakae Sushi. Then went home. At 11.45pm (cos elf was so impatient), they BANGED on my house door and gave me a CAKE with a BDAY SONG! And apparently my parents were already informed in the morning. =.= They are good actors.

So thanks everyone who made my 21st birthday special!

2) DVBS
Great experiences, young adults' bonding wise. But I'll blog about this in a separate post.

3) Job
So right after DVBS I started on my temp job - personal assistant. Doing filing and calling and filing and calling and filing. Haha. I do learn new things, especially organisation wise, and interviewing wise. And almost everyday I got challenged to thicken my membrane like skin to call up strangers to arrange for appointment for my boss(es). If i'm doing this all the way till school start, it means that I won't have anybreak at all.

So, from birthday week, to one week of doing survey job (ad hoc money earning lobang which turned out to be very strength consuming), one week of preparing for DVBS, one week of DVBS, 2 months of temp job (no public holidays within this period...)

all these are equal to....

NO ONE SINGLE WEEK OF BREAK FOR MYSELF!!!!!!!!!! I use to be so bored I just rot at home. Now I can't even have a week where I can just do whatever I want to do. Not even saturdays with my tuition never stopping ($%*&$%$).

So it's gonna be a busy busy vacation.

Not a vacation really.... CRY

"Crash"

2008-05-01T23:41:00.004+08:00

From Wikipedia...

This increase in the number of the adenosine receptors (i.e. caffein
intake) makes the body much more sensitive to adenosine, with two primary
consequences. First, the stimulatory effects of caffeine are substantially
reduced, a phenomenon known as a tolerance
adaptation. Second, because these adaptive responses to caffeine
make individuals much more sensitive to adenosine, a reduction in caffeine
intake will effectively increase the normal physiological effects of adenosine,
resulting in unwelcome withdrawal
symptoms in tolerant users.

Because adenosine, in part,
serves to regulate blood pressure by causing vasodilation, the increased effects
of adenosine due to caffeine withdrawal cause the
blood vessels of the head to dilate, leading to an excess of blood in the head
and causing a headache and nausea.
Reduced catecholamine activity may cause feelings of
fatigue and drowsiness. A reduction in serotonin levels when caffeine use is stopped can cause anxiety,
irritability, inability to concentrate and diminished motivation to initiate or
to complete daily tasks; in extreme cases it may cause mild depression.
Together, these effects have come to be known as a "crash".

In large amounts, and especially over
extended periods of time, caffeine can lead to a condition known as caffeinism. Caffeinism usually
combines caffeine dependency with a
wide range of unpleasant physical and mental
conditions including nervousness,
irritability, anxiety, tremulousness, muscle twitching (hyperreflexia),
insomnia, headaches, respiratory alkalosis and heart
palpitations. Furthermore, because caffeine increases the
production of stomach acid, high usage over time can lead to peptic ulcers,
erosive esophagits, and (blah blah blah)

There are four caffeine-induced psychiatric
disorders recognized by the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of
Mental Disorders, Fourth Edition: caffeine intoxication, caffeine-induced
anxiety disorder, caffeine-induced sleep disorder, and caffeine-related disorder
not otherwise specified (NOS).

Oh crap.

Whatever

2008-04-27T19:38:00.005+08:00

The exams are here, and I'm struggling with being diligent. When I'm in school all is fine. I can study. When I'm home every motivation just falls apart and I keep giving in to doing nothing online. After which I will feel absolutely lousy. I hate myself.

And I keep eating when I study. It keeps me focused. I'm putting on weight fast. Shoot.

And I'm addicted to coffee. It doesn't matter if it works anymore, I just need to have it for assurance's sake. And if I feel down I'll go grab some expensive Starbucks coffee. Which is bad for my wallet (or purse).

21st birthday is coming. Don't know whether I should have a bbq or not.

And I feel like an outcast. Please don't make yourself a happy-2-of-us island. It forms a bubble around you and bounces everyone else off, makes any one who tries to talk to either of you feel like a criminal.

Crap. I'm losing it. Feel like flying to the moon, staying on that big white balloon and never come back. So what if there's no inhabitant? Having human beings around you can just be as depressing.

Black America President

2008-03-21T02:41:00.007+08:00

If I'm American, I'll vote for him.

He is the first president (according to some Americans who commented on his speech) who addresses the fragile and touchy issue of race directly. In the midst of his presidential campaign even. At the time where he is the most fragile to attacks by the media and people who shuns the issue of race, he faced it, and addressed it in is reality - that the angers and resentment from the blacks and the whites are still unresolved. This is controversy, it's almost taboo. But he faced it, and talk to everyone as who they are - adults.

Inexperience Obama may be, it does seem that in the state of mess and chaos in American administration, what they need is a breath of fresh air, or a new creative mind whose fire and passion to build a better world is not yet extinguished by years in politics.

"Contrary to the claims of some of my critics, black and white, I have never been so naive as to believe that we can get beyond our racial divisions in a single election cycle, or with a single candidacy - particularly a candidacy as imperfect as my own. "

Raw, unpretentious.

On a lighter note. Aforementioned The Daily Show of course covered this news. As serious as this speech is, Stewart and team managed to give it a humourous coverage. I think Stewart is impressed by Obama, if not supportive. But in accordance to his political satire show, he has to still poke fun at some parts of it. It's nicely done, I feel. (You can also view this clip as a summary of what Obama said, instead of the half an hour one above.)

*Disclaimer: I do not have a stand on the pastor's view, because I don't know the context. I'm more interested in Obama's responses to this tabooed issue.

Also, thereafter follows a mock interview with one of his comedic correspondent. The topic, aptly, is a dialogue between black man and white man (only Stewart is a Jew). This act brilliantly point out small instances of peeves amoung the races, which were taboo-ic nontheless if discussed in a serious forum. But such is the power of comedy - that in the name of comedy we can say things that we normally would be shot for. Check it out, it's brilliant.

"(Comparing to the current media environment)Back in the middle ages, the jester is perhaps the only one who can tell the truth without getting his head cut off." - Al Gore on The Daily Show

More Jon Stewart

2008-03-15T00:10:00.003+08:00

Actually this is for my personal reference more than a blog. Haha.

So, it was after 9/11, America was in terrible mourning, and Comedy Central's funny Daily Show has to come back on on the 20th Sept. It was the first show after the tragedy. It seems inappropriate to even joke, much less mock the headlines as the show is suppose to do (headlines being 9/11 at that time).

See how well Jon handled the opening of the show.

For the rest of the show he showed clips from past episodes - fit the comedic aim but not being disrespectful to the tragic atmosphere.

The Daily Show

2008-03-11T21:25:00.005+08:00

Nothing like Jon Stewart's brand of political satire / fake news humour. Love it. =D I wish we can do that in Singapore, but the only fake news comedy we have here is done by cheesy comedic hosts about really fake things (oxymoron unintended). The kind of openess, laugh-at-ourselves humour just isn't there. Perhaps the closes political satire we can get here is Mr Brown (http://www.mrbrown.com/), which is softening up a little since he got sacked by that cowardly TODAY newspaper.

Why can't the government get it? Just because your people poke fun at you and criticise you doesn't make them unpatriotic. For all you know, they know more about what you do than those apathetic elites.

Got to know about Jon Stewart via his Oscar 2008 hosting. I found him hilarious and started youtubing. Apparently he's a concern with American politics and his work in The Daily Show hilariously pokes fun of politicians and their weird etics. I love the way he criticise, humourously, the ridiculous way the Iraq situation is now. Here's one of my favourite: them poking fun at the way the US gov try to euphemise their torture technic, waterboarding, when interogating their prisoners.

Oh, and John Oliver is hilarious too!

Of course, behind all these laughs and jokes, Jon Stewart is concerned with America politics. There are serious interviews, with laughers, in The Daily Show sometimes too. According to other interviews of Stewart, it seems like he is one political thinker. He has alot of opinions and views and, according to some viewers, he is truly concerned with the American people.

You know...in the midst of these humours, there's a cynical shade of truth in it... If there's a Jon Stewart in Singapore, jaded people sick of ~~the state's times~~ *COUGH* The Strait's Times would turn to it for real news.

Here's his Oscar 2008 performance.

HELP!

2008-03-03T14:56:00.001+08:00

Hey, ppl who read my blog, may I know whether my right sidebar is beside my posts, or you have to scroll way down to see the sidebar?

'Cos all along on my laptop I see it beside my posts. But browsing from the school comp shows the sidebar way below.

Gimme a tag ya? (It's at the sidebar beside/way below the post.)

Thank ye!

Let's be honest

2008-02-29T18:22:00.001+08:00

A 'SECURITY LAPSE' led to the escape of the leader of the Singapore's wing
of the Islamic militant network, Jemaah Islamiah (JI), and drew an apology from
Home Affairs Minister Wong Kan Seng on Thursday.

more on it here...

C'mon Singapore, just admit it... you're not as good as you boast.

Just admit it lah~ Don't worry, I'll still remain a Singapore citizen and love you as much as I always have been. I just wish you are more honest with yourself.

Sian...

2008-02-28T21:55:00.016+08:00

Projects, tests, weekly work.... It doesn't help when the student is LAZY BEYOND WORDS!

Just some pics before I continue reading Copernicus and his revolution.

Beautiful half moon. =) If not for my GEK1506 project, I wouldn't realise the beauty of the moon cycle. I love the moon!

Stepping on a rainbow~!

This is funny. LOL!

By the way, Rob, I've finished Calvin and Hobbes! Muahahaha!

Alright, back to see what Copernicus did to change the world, and what others like Bruno and Galileo did to give Coper the fame. After that's it's reading up on what on earth English was like in the old times, in its writing system, grammar, vocab, and phonology. After which, I would need to decide what to present on what kind of English do toddlers speak next Friday.

Tomorrow I'll be doing a $10 survey about my enthusiasm for internet news, and after that, more Coper.

Oh, and Oscars was funny. And this wasn't even the best. Jon Stewart is a real tickler. Wahaha!

"Julie Christie was absolutely amazing in 'Away from Her' ... a moving
story of a woman who forgets her own husband," he said. "Hillary
Clinton called it the feel-good movie of the year."

ROFLOL!!!

If only I have Comedy Central here in Singapore. =D

Loving the "unlovely"...

2008-02-17T23:45:00.006+08:00

On Friday, I was listening to a sermon by Dr Stephen Jones on Reflecting God's Love. He said that we Christians are commanded to love those that are considered unpopular and unlovely to the world, or even to us. Be it looks, attitudes, or social status, there are people all around us that we will rather avoid because we just do not want to talk to them. During the apostles's time, they were commanded by Christ to preach the gospel beyond their comfort zone (Jerusalem and Judea) to Samaria, a place where the people Jews despises were. Samaritans and Jews had bad experiences with each other, not just because Samaritans were considered inferior to the Jews due to them being mix blood. Also, the Bible says that it is nothing great to love those that love us, or those that can benefit us, because the ungodly does that too. But it is greater and required of us to love those that hate us, and those that will not benefit us. These are all reflecting the love of God.

Just last Sunday, it was a day which we had prepared a dinner for those in Bukit Batok Home for the Aged. So we brought the Christians out of the home and to the church. Pastor James preached, and after that we served them dinner. I had a wonderful and refreshing time of serving these old folks, talking to them (they are lonely you know?) and holding their hands when they walk.

I must admit that it is hard to stir myself to serve these old folks. I think Dr Jone's message will apply to this case. These old folks are people I cannot communicate with (I don't know dialects and can hardly understand them), some are mentally not very sound. They, being old folks, naturally have some smell on them, including urine smell. That's natural. So it's hard really, for this pampered kid to serve them.

I thank God He gave me the heart. I know it's not my own, for I can never by myself be humbled down to serve these people whom are considered "unlovely". But I still have much to learn to humble to. Just look at pastor's and deacon's and other aunties's and uncles's zeal in really chatting with the old folks, feeding them, etc, I am put to shame.

Particularly because I had followed Aunty Theresa to the Home to fetch the old folks, so I got to witness for myself how hard the work there is now. For years, our church has been going to BBH (previously Woodlands Home) to preach the gospel. We hold services there for the Christians as well as welcoming and inviting non Christians to join us. Some will even venture to the wards to talk to the old folks who are not keen to come to the service, to tell them the gosepl.

That was then. That was when we had true religious freedom to speak to the old folks about the Lord Jesus. But right now, there is a rule that forbids us to invite non Christians anymore. Even who they consider "non-Christians" are problematic. They consider the status of their religion at the time of their entering the home or from their family members. Which means that old folks who have come to trust in Jesus or who were even baptised by us through our work all these years are forbidden to come.

I had only heard these from Aunty Theresa's and Aunty Mrs Lim's mouth during prayer meeting last month. Because I'm now involved in evangelism at HDB flats, I had not been going to the Home to serve. That Sunday, I followed Aunty Theresa to fetch the old folks. I saw this old man asking Aunty Theresa whether his name is in the list (list of "Christians" that we can bring to church or our service). He kept asking and asking, and when we saw that it is not, he said it's ok.

This man have been with us in the services all these years, but now he is forbidden to join us! And there are a few others whom I recognise as well. All of a sudden I see how persercuted the work over there really is. We no longer are able to reach out. Those whom have heard the gospel cannot come with us. Those who may well be saved cannot join us anymore! It's like looking at souls who stretch out their hands but we cannot grab them.

On the way back to church in the mini bus, I wept a little. Just that morning the sermon was about hell. I was really upset. If the door is closed to us, we can no longer reach out to them, which means that more souls are going to go to hell without Christ. I'm truly upset. Even now.

Souls are reaching out, and we cannot grab them. Then there are those who have heard the gospel and have every freedom to come to church to worship God, or to serve God, or to pray, or to praise God - there are some of these free folks in the church and out there who will not even give a few hours of their Sundays to God who is so merciful to them.

Even I, who am saved and who am serving, I am saved and have known the depth of God's mercy and grace - yet I will sin against God so often. I just owe God so so so much... Why did God choose to save me?

The Lord's Mercy

2008-02-17T01:01:00.003+08:00

Lamentation 3:
[22] It is of the LORD's mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not.
[23] They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness.
[24] The LORD is my portion, saith my soul; therefore will I hope in him.
[25] The LORD is good unto them that wait for him, to the soul that seeketh him.
[26] It is good that a man should both hope and quietly wait for the salvation of the LORD.
[27] It is good for a man that he bear the yoke in his youth.
[28] He sitteth alone and keepeth silence, because he hath borne it upon him.
[29] He putteth his mouth in the dust; if so be there may be hope.
[30] He giveth his cheek to him that smiteth him: he is filled full with reproach.
[31] For the Lord will not cast off for ever:
[32] But though he cause grief, yet will he have compassion according to the multitude of his mercies.

This will be my song. It is wonderful to have such a God as heavenly Father, though I am so unworthy.

I cannot thank God enough for His mercy in saving me.

I need to praise Him more...

Photos post!

2008-02-06T23:13:00.000+08:00

Some photo updates of what has happened! Scroll down if you will. =)

These are a few of my tuition kiddies! Shan, Nerrisa, and Xavier.

Saw the little creature behind Arts canteen one day. Can you spot it? The people who saw it with me were like, "Wow, see! Look at these!" And I took out my phone to snap it. Looks like we city kids are a real nature-deprived bunch.

Took 154 home one night, and it's all empty. Kinda like riding with a chauffer with your private car. Haha.

Nowadays I've taken to walking to school or home I'll walk half an hour to Kent Vale (condo for NUS staffs I think), then take a shuttle bus in.

Mommy baked this with her friend 2 weeks before CNY. I told her it would be gone before CNY. I'm half right. It's 7/8 gone by CNY eve. Haha. So we baked some more!

About the saturday before CNY, we started baking. (Baking frenzy man...)

First, we fry our own peanuts.

Then blend them yourself...

Baker at work.

My loveletters!!

The tiny workstation...

End product of loveletters! I folded them instead of roll.

And the extra bottle of kueh makmur!

It took about 4 hours in all. But the effort was worth it. It's great fun making your own cny goodies instead of buying them. =)

Christ Grace Church blog!

2008-01-31T00:02:00.000+08:00

So we've got a blog up and running! It has basic information about my church and also notes on our weekly worship sermons. Also, there's a link to our YAF blogspot, just as basic as its mother-blog. Haha. Will be playing around with it. We're also thinking of making a proper website with a webhost. Anyone know what on earth we'll need to do? Seems like not many IT net savvy people in church ya. Hehe.

Address is at the links section on the right of this blog. Or, just click here: http://christgracechurch.blogspot.com/

God always encourages - ALL the way

2008-01-18T16:25:00.000+08:00

All the way my Savior leads me;
What have I to ask beside?
Can I doubt His tender mercy,
Who through life has been my Guide?
Heav’nly peace, divinest comfort,
Here by faith in Him to dwell!
For I know, whate’er befall me,
Jesus doeth all things well;
For I know, whate’er befall me,
Jesus doeth all things well.

All the way my Savior leads me,
Cheers each winding path I tread;
Gives me grace for every trial,
Feeds me with the living Bread.
Though my weary steps may falter,
And my soul athirst may be,
Gushing from the Rock before me,
Lo! A spring of joy I see;
Gushing from the Rock before me,
Lo! A spring of joy I see.

All the way my Savior leads me
O the fullness of His love!
Perfect rest to me is promised
In my Father’s house above.
When my spirit, clothed immortal,
Wings its flight to realms of day
This my song through endless ages—
Jesus led me all the way;
This my song through endless ages—
Jesus led me all the way.

Some small misunderstandings occured, and I was a little discouraged 15 minutes ago (now clarified, thank the LORD). I was browsing through some hymns in the midi website, and remembered this particular one.

"All the way my Saviour leads me"

God didn't save us then leave us alone. He saved us, and became our Father. We became His adopted children through Jesus Christ. Now that He is our Father, He takes care of us all the way; not half way, not just when we are saved, not just when we are zealously serving, but also in our backslidings, our sadness, and our discouraged moments. And in His care, we are led by the Lord Jesus Christ. This reminds me of the Shepherd Psalm, Psalm 23, which gives a beautiful image of the Lord being our Shepherd, leading us little sheeps through dark and scary valleys. This is the love of God. The hymn is an exposition of His gracious leading. Finally, it ends with the joyous hope of being able to sing "Jesus led me all the way" for eternity when we are in Heaven.

"What have I to ask beside?"

If I could be anything...

2008-01-18T02:13:00.000+08:00

I would be an astronaut. I would travel to space and see the stars and moon and the planets. If I behold God's creation, I'll remember how small I am, and know that my problems are really small. Taking the astronomy class now, I really wish I can see the billions and billions of stars in the sky. I wish I have a hammock on top of some roof where I can hide whenever I'm troubled, just to have my own time to comfort myself with talking to God and meditating His glory.

Or I may want to be a traveller. I'll travel to the deserts where there is no man made lights to obscure the wondrous heavenly bodies. I would love to star at them till I fall asleep, letting the last thought of my mind be the glory of God. Then maybe I can see that my problems are really nothing and maybe I won't be so upset easily. Or I can travel to the poles, to see the auroras, to experience how is it like having only 1 day and 1 night throughout a year.

I just wish to get out of this stifling city environment, just a month will do, to take a good look at what the rest of the world. I want to know what the polar bears see; how does the world look like to them. How do penguins feel? Do they ever feel nauseus being upside down?

In the hymn "Sweet Hour of Prayer", the lyric says something about us flying through the air. It may be figurative, but I really do wish I can do that. The vast expanse of the sky is more liveable than this stifling earth.

Oh no! A Dilemma!

2008-01-15T20:24:00.000+08:00

I was just blogging about my modules last night, and today I'm facing a dilemma between 2 modules.

Well, apparently, Dr Ho Chee Lick took over the CL2281 (Translation and Interpretation module) from another lecturer, and he doesn't know much about interpretation. I signed up for this module especially to take interpretation (simultanous translation and consecutive translation). So when Dr Ho says he is not going to focus on interpretation for this module, it was a big disappointment. Furthermore, he sort of hinted that he will be repeating some stuff from CL2280 (which I have taken already). So, all in all, I don't feel like I will be learning many new things from here. I may be wrong, but the Dr Ho's presentation really make me doubtful.

So I quickly, as soon as lecture is over at 10am, went to the Library and bid for CL3281 (Advance Translation). Originally, I wanted to take that next semester after the Interpretation class and after some more practices since I got a B- in CL2280 before taking advance translation. I also sat in their first lecture int he afternoon on the same day. It looks tough, but I know I am going to learn much for written translation.

Herein is the dilemma: After dropping back to 3.73 CAP last semester, I wanted to do really well for this semester, and so I selected many level 2 modules (including CL2281) and a S/U-able GEM. But now that I don't feel comfortable in CL2281, switching to CL3281 will mean that I'm adding on the possibilities of NOT doing well this sem again. But I enjoy that module. On the other hand, the repetitive CL2281 will mean that I can have a higher chance of scoring well.

Here is the dilemma: should I take CL2281 PURELY for the sake of improving my CAP, or take CL3281 for the sake of learning but at the risk of my CAP?

I really don't know man. I really don't know. I have until 27th Jan to withdraw before the W period sets in.

Modules For This Sem (and some thoughts on teaching)

2008-01-14T23:05:00.000+08:00

I'm taking:

EL2111 - Historical Variation of English
EL2151 - Social Variation of English
EL3207 - Child Language
CL2281 - Translation and Interpretation
GEK1506 - Heavenly Mathematics and Cultural Astronomy

So far I've attended the Historical Variation of English and Heavenly Mathematics lectures. The former has interesting content but the lecture ain't stimulating enough. I forsee myself dozing off. I like Dr Peter Tan, of course, it's just that, well, it's a little tiresom to follow the contents, interesting though it is.

Heavenly Maths is taught by Prof Aslaksen, who really knows how to deliver his passion in class. The content itself is interesting too. Go to www.chinesecalendar.org if interested.

Actually, there is really nothing like being passionate about the subject you teach. It will inevitably be contagious to the students. It makes the life of the teachers easier too, you know? When the contents that you have to keep repeating is the same, the only saving point is its interest level to you. If not, you will end up mundane and boring, killing the interest of the students and murdering any possibilities of them ever touching that field in tertiary education.

For teachers whose teaching subject is not their passion (because one's passion can be things as random as coins, trains, and origami), the only other saving point is his or her particular interest in the wellbeing of the students. And it has to be specific. Many have asked me why don't I want to teach primary school children. Well, as much as I like children, I cannot pitch my communication at their level. I find it hard to go all squeaky-voiced and child like when balancing my teaching. Of course, there are many people who are able to do that, and I admire them. It's really a lot harder to teach K1 to read than teaching Shakespeare to Sec 3s, because the difference in frequency is so wide that it is truly a gift to be able to teach young children.

I digress. What I really want to conclude eventually is that I really hate teachers who teach for the money. MOE is putting up huge sum to attract the wrong crowd. People who have no where else to go and no other job to do turn to teaching as their refuge. Of course, there are some sort of classroom assessment, which only serves to filter out the really bad ones. So how about the not the worst but still bad kind? They have no passion for the subjects, or worse still, in depth knowledge, and they take pride in being impersonal to students. 12 years in the education system, I have come to despise teachers who do not see students more than statistics on their portfolio. I have also come to detest teachers whose motivation to teach is their paycheck. They are a burden to the students. It's no wonder students want to be lazy, they have no example to look up to!

On the other hand, truly passionate or caring teachers are often overlooked, especially the latter quality. This is simply because these qualities cannot manifest itself on papers and on statistics. These teachers seek the improvement of students, not their final result, and they take pride in imparting their passion and spreading their ideology. 12 years in the education system, I can count these sort of teachers only with 1 hand. That's a really sad fact.

And then there's the jaded ones, the in-betweens. They come in with a fire to teach, or to "nurture", as the MOE slogan goes. But as time goes, with all the marking, the expectation of grades, pressures from the HOD and the parents, drudgery of CCAs and admin work, they just lost the fire. They lament at their lose but that's nothing much they can do.

It's sad, the system. I just hope my own passion that is burning right now would not be doused.

Suki Sushi Day

2008-01-12T23:34:00.000+08:00

So I went to stuff myself with sushi (literally stuff!) with El, Robin and Eliseus this afternoon. The guys went in first at 3.50pm. Because I had tuition till 3.30pm, I rushed down to Cineleisure only to reach at 4.30pm. Nevertheless, these boys were not half full. Haha!

I must say Suki Sushi buffet is definitely better. But of course, it's more expensive than Sakae Sushi. Student's buffet can easily cost about $19 after GST, and adults...well, $20 plus I guess. El's pocket has got a big big whole today. Hahaha! Why I think Suki's is better it's because of the choices they have. Plus the free flow drink! Although without the mochi ice-cream, they have delicious cream puffs and fruit on the belt for grabs, as part of the buffet. Haha, that makes up for the dessert already. The buffet also includes sashimi (not the freshest, but not un-fresh either) and many tempura items that Sakae doesn't offer for buffet. (Fried sotong is awesome!)

Pics here!

Eliseus's very very hot tofu!

El satisfying his craving.

This is only halfway through...

The remnents. Had to resort to Number Game to finish them. Haha.

Rob's achievement! (No lah, that's our total plates...hehe)

The number game.

El got it!

68 plates! That's how many we ate! Well, plus there are some of our orders which they combined onto 1 plate. So, give and take, I think we hit 80 plates! Wahaha!

I'm really happy that Eliseus came to join us. He's always floating around in church, I never really get to talk to him much, since I don't know what common topics we might have. But I remember when he was younger (12 I think), he was really funny and joking about. Back then he was still a chubby primary school kiddie, now he's all grown up! So tall lah. Haha. Like my own bro.

Well I thank God for the fact that we are financially able to afford the meal. I hope I was not being too spendthrift! I shall hold my pocket bridle until the next special occasion. =) Must be a good steward of the money that God gave me, can't anyhow spend. Hehe... (oops.. -.-").

Cbox!

2008-01-10T11:12:00.001+08:00

I'm so not using Tag-world anymore (that's my old tag board). It keeps having server maintenance. Here's the new Cbox! And you don't need to refresh to see your post. Yay!

Sian man, trying to organise a sushi outing, but it turned out so hard. Worry about $, worry about time, worry about location. Want a time of fellowship also so hard. -.-"

Updates next time, bidding for modules now. Thank God for those that I've gotten!

Makeover

2008-01-07T23:14:00.000+08:00

Yup. This is the new look. I'm still a little iffy about it. There's always the old template code that I've saved in case I regret it tomorrow. Haha.

Any comments?

Belated New Year Post

2008-01-04T21:38:00.000+08:00

Like last year, my New Year post is belated. For the first few days of 2008 I've been thinking what I should write, but never really got down to it.

So 2007 sees CGC trying to pick itself up from the post-trial state. After the church camp in Dec 2006, people are kind of motivated in their own ways, and in June 2007, we gather in Mersing (Johor) for a church camp of planning, prayer, visions, and resolutions. It was a motivating camp, God gave us a wonderful time of rest and fellowship amidst the tiredless meetings. I can see that even Pastor James and Aunty Amy, the main casualties of satan's attack got to find motivation and rest through this camp. This I am very thankful. I thank God also that He had used this camp to strengthen my sense of belonging to the church, and burden me to rebuild these Jerusalem walls together with fellow Christ Grace Church memebers.

Our Youth Fellowship had also revamp itself in 2007. We now call it the Young Adult Fellowship, which consist of not only young adults but also seeks to integrate the young secondary school people. So far, God granted us a very blessed time of monthly fellowship meeting in Reverand Joseph's house, learning and discussing practical issues of Christian living, like dressing, relationships, devotions, finance management etc. The rest of the weeks the YAF would go to the blocks around Guillemard Road to evangelise door to door. Evangelism is one channel that God never fail to use to refresh my thankfulness for my salvation. For everytime I see someone who heard the gospel, or know the gospel, or who had actually "studied" Christianity, I pity at their final choice of rejection. Indeed, it is all head knowledge unless God open his/her eyes and heart to believe in the Lord Jesus Christ.

Oh and this year see 2 addition to our church! Wow! Like, last year I was crying about the people who left, and we keep praying for God to increase our church, and now we have Binqiang and Shaojuan! Both are rather regular in the church. Must pray for Shaojuan though, that she'll overcome her sleepy problem so that she can worship God more regularly. I really thank God for her. I've been good friend with her in secondary school, but she had never really want to come to my church, or go to other churches, or wanting to know more about God in general. I have been asking her to come for my church's gospel meeting every Christmas, but she kept declining. In JC I lost touch with her, until suddenly in June 2007 she messaged me asking whether she can come and join me in my church. It's not just worshipping in the same church that rejoices me, but the fact that she is beginning to grow in knowledge of God and change in her attitude towards the world. Indeed, God would have us to be in the world and not of the world, when we are saved, we can expect our value system towards the things of this world change. Education is not just for myself to gain in status, but so that I may have a good testimony to show to my unbelieving parents.

I was looking back at my old posts in order to prepare for my testimony on the Thanksgiving service. I realised that God indeed had answered my prayers, slowly but surely, according to His own timing. There are things that I was sad about and prayed about, and even blogged about, but after some time I just stop praying about it as life gives you more worries to pray about. So when God slowly grant it, I didn't even realize that God did it. I'm so negligent towards the mercies of God. Sigh.

So I thank God for seeing me through 2007. Indeed, everyday, every hour, if not for God's preservation, I may have lose a limp, my life, or my abilities, anytime. So often I hear of sudden deaths on TV. Just think about it, think about the cars that God had prevented from banging you down, the lightning that never strike on you, the fall that isn't fatal, the cut that did not become an infection which cause you to rot and die. I mean, seriously, just think about it. The invisible mercies of God that we cannot see, that we forget to thank. We gripe about the traffic, but we forget to thank Him for journey mercies.

I pray that He will really teach me to "number our days, that we may apply our hearts to wisdom" in 2008. It is only when we think that we have so much time in our hands that we procrastinate. I am a very great sinner of that. Procrastination means I am a really bad steward of the resource of Time that God has given me. Procrastination, not just in school work and exams (though a very great sinner of that), but also in things of God - service, daily prayer and Bible reading... etc. As I shared in the previous post, I really had failed to STUDY the word of God, to go indepth into His holy word.

May God so help me.

I thank God once again for His many mercies in my life, for being my Father in Heaven, my God, my Lord, my Saviour, and my best Friend in life.

YAF Camp

2007-12-29T23:50:00.000+08:00

Alright, it has been long since I my last post. I guess I was just lazy. A few things happened. But I'll just blog about the YAF Camp.

Thank the Lord! It was a refreshing camp, particularly in bonding. One of the aim of this year's YAF is to bond, and the camp is a highlight for this intent. So we had the camp from 8th Dec to 11th Dec. We went shopping for groceries, cooked, cleaned the chalet, organize the logistics, etc, all by ourselves (well, with some kindness from other adults once in a while...haha). So now I really appreciate the aunties who kept the kitchen so supplied and clean during our church camps last time. I also admired the treasurers, the logistics people and all the committee people. First try - it was really difficult to be organised.

So we had fun, we did stuff together, I believe the guys became rather good friends now? At least, on the friend's level. Shaojuan also got to know the others youths better, like Felicia, BQ, and Rob. I guess we are doing fine on the "friends" level. Next aim: the spiritual plateu.

Also, the BBQ session we had on Sunday evening was really blessed. So many adults (more than we'd expected) came and supported the youths. Especially when the drizzle delayed our BBQ fire, the adults pitched in by steaming some corns, steaming the supposed-to-be-bbqed-fish, made desserts. Love the fellowship around the pit, table, and bench. Haha. Thank God.

We also had the opportunity to devote 1 whole day to learning the word of God. The day started with discussion on Tongue Speaking and Health and Wealth Gospel. We went so in depth that it dragged way beyond the schedule. So we ended up cancelling many of the other topics and put them on hold for other days. Perhaps I'll blog about these 2 topics soon.

But one thing I really learnt from that study day is that God's word is truely in depth. Although I know I shouldn't, I still have the tendency of the "I've read this before already" syndrom whenever I read certain parts of the Bible. Do you know that the same verse that you read in one way can be distorted and twisted in its meaning so much so that the God it portrays is beyond recognition? Then, do you know what are the other verses in the Bible that would show you whose interpretation is right? If we keep being so ignorant about the Bible, we would be easily misled into strange teachings by other so-called Christians.

"Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth." - 2 Time 2:15

To rightly divide the word of truth means that you can accurately draw a line between the rights and wrongs. And it is one who "studies" the word of God who can do it, and thus not needing to be ashamed by those who would question you about your God. I am still so far behind this standard. The word of God is so RICH that this is almost unattainable. But I speak for myself. By the grace of God, we strive, and let God reveal to us the knowledge of His word.

Thank the Lord for the freedom to hold and read a Bible in Singapore. Many societies out there, you can't even get a glimpse of it. Dr Stephen Jones once shared about his mission trip to Russia, when it first opened up from Communism. He went to the Catholic church building (state controlled I think) to give out books and books of the Bible. There came an old lady who begged to have one too. As he had ran out his supply, he ran back to his van to take a Bible and gave it to the lady. The lady was so overjoyed she cried and kissed the floor where he stood. Apparently, in the church there was a Bible - framed up nicely in a glass boxed to a particular page - but common people were not allowed to read it. The old lady wasn't even allowed to copy the words down for herself to read.

Dear fellow Christians, do we have that joy? Do our hearts still burn for the word of God? Often we read the Bible, although knowing that it is suppose to be "God speaking to us", we do not treat it so just because it does not speak directly to our problems. But who are we to determine what God should tell us? We read, we study, that's our duty. God will speak to us in His own way! I remember many occasions in my trouble when in my mind pops up words from the Bible, or messages from sermons which was spoken days, weeks, months, or even years ago - and God brings them to my mind to encourage me. So our duty is just to read, to hear, to study. Gods will speak to us according to His will.

New experiences

2007-12-07T01:23:00.000+08:00

I experience 2 new things today! Still feeling so excited about them. Haha! How should I start?

Ok, today is Mary's 21st birthday celebration. We were suppose to go to Siloso beach there, have pizzas, and hang out. So I met up with Sookwin, Hannah, and Maverick at Harbourfront to go into Sentosa together.

Hey, wanna know how to go to Sentosa for free?

Well, we took a shuttle bus to Sentosa Cove. Note, Sentosa Cove, not Sentosa. Sentosa Cove is some residential area to-be for those billionairs who wanna leave on the island and have their own yacht and be cut off from us peasants in the mainland. It's very luxurious. So ya, we took a shuttle bus there by mistake! We ended up in the ulu east side of Sentosa, which has no other buses to go anywhere else in Sentosa except back to Harbourfront. So we decided to WALK to the nearest civilization (Dolphin Lagoon) to take the internal shuttle bus. But the security guard informed us it's a 30 minutes walk, and the road has many up-and-down slopes.

Well we found it too lame to take a bus back to Harbourfront and chose to walk. Here's my first experience: we hitch-hiked! At least, we tried for about 10 minutes before a lorry finally pulled up for us. All the other cars and lorries before us didn't care about us. They are mostly Singaporeans of course. So selfish. I mean, c'mon, did the 4 of us, 3 girls and 1 guy, in casual beach wear (except Hannah in her flowy long skirt) look like we're going to rob them, kill them, and take their car? What can we possibly do? Stab them with our snacks packages?

Haha, anyway, the lorry that helped us are actually construction workers, they were in Sentosa Cove doing some work. So the 4 of us climbed to the open back of the lorry and took a ride until the nearest monorail stop. They were so friendly and helpful. There was 2 Indians and 1 Malaysian Chinese at the back of the lorry with us. It was wet, so we squated down and held on to the railing tightly, the wind blowing on our faces as the lorry drove fast down the road. It's really some experience!! Hitch-hiking. Haha!! Too bad there's no photo. Oh ya, so we ended up going into Sentosa without paying. Haha!

Ok, experience number 2.

Well, this is not as exciting as the first. Since we were in Sentosa, we decided to go for the Luge Rid e. I have always thought that I'm not afraid of heights. I mean, I can stand on a tall building and look down without shivering. But I realise when I'm in an open car - OPEN CAR - and kind of ride when you go up the hills for skiing, I cannot stand it. Well, I survived. I tried to look far far at the sea which did not fail to awe me. It's really very beautiful from high up, if only I'm not afraid I might enjoy the bird's eye view more. The Luge ride ain't exactly very thrilling lah. The first round, 'cos I was new to it. I went slow and steady. The second round I just zoomed during the straight roads. But I was still one of the last though. So silly. Haha!

Mary provided so much food, very delicious pizza. Thank God for the good weather after a deluge in the afternoon. I had a great time getting to know more JSMers.

Hmm... how should I celebrate my 21st birthday?

I LOST MY PHONE!

2007-12-06T01:43:00.000+08:00

Well, not mine, technically. It's my brother's phone. I was using it as a backup since my 6288 is under repair.

I went to Plaza Singapura's washroom today (Wednesday). Got a call, picked it up, and...PUT IT ON THE TOILET ROLL HOLDER! And I got out without it. Not a minute after that i realized and quickly return to get it. The girl whom I recognize went in the cubicle after me walked passed. Somehow I decided to give a benefit of doubt, and wanted to check first before asking her. My stupid idiotic brain didn't realize that I can NEVER ask her again if I let her passed.

So I checked. It's not there. I quickly borrowed my friend's phone to call. IT WAS TURNED OFF! She ( I assume it's her) took it with the intention to take it. I was fuming, and started running around PS to look for that girl (in red and black top).

You know what? I saw her at Breadtalk. I was at level 2, she was at level 1. I quickly ran down, but I losed her in the crowd.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!

CAN THERE BE A STUPIDIER PERSON?????? WHY DIDN'T I ASK HER WHEN I SAW HER!!!

ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

WWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

*BIG BIG SIGH*

What's done cannot be undone. My brother said there's no need to get him another one since he has one to use now. But, well, I can't just forget about it lah... It's not right. My house use to have 2 backup phones. 1 gave away. Now this one is lost. NONE now.

*Another BIG sigh*

Heart pain lah...

Heard in a sermon that when Martin Luther (the Reformation one, not the African) was robbed for the first time, he gave thanks to God for:

1) This being the FIRST TIME (so he hadn't been robbed before)

2) Being poor (so that his loss was little)

There's another 3 points which I had forgotten.

Well I guess I can see it this way too. 1) I actually OWN a phone to be stolen. There are still Singaporeans who can't even afford to have one. 2) It's a backup phone, and not my $198 Nokia 6288 (that doesn't mean I'm not guilty...). 3) I learnt the invaluable lesson of NOT PUTTING THE PHONE ON THE TOILET ROLL HOLDER NEXT TIME! I do that alot in school.

*SIGH* Oh well.

Oh, friends (who acutally read this blog), please give me an SMS to let me know your number again. I don't have any number now.

Post-Exam Post

2007-12-05T00:27:00.000+08:00

Hehe, finally!

This time round what I expected turned out to be different from the reality. The one that I thought would be a breeze (CL2280 Translation) turned out to be a very tedious paper, which I can't finish. EL3255 English in SEA which I thought I wouldn't survive turned out quite alright, at least pass-able. Looks like the difference between tutorials and exam performances is really fat. The speed difference between using a computer and flipping three dictionaries horribly obese. (CL2280 requires me, a poor girl with no money to buy $116 electronic dictionary, to flip three dictionaries: Chinese, English, and English-Chinese dictionary.) What's worse is those around you with electronic dictionary remarking that the paper is a breeze. @#^@#!$!^!!!

Nevermind, it's over. Gonna make plans! This month so many people are having birthdays. I'm going to have to over-spend. Especially with the YAF Camp and the holidays...I'm going to spend more. Haha.

I want a dog!

我是主羊

2007-11-08T23:42:00.000+08:00

After 3 postings of nothing godly, I think I better remind myself and my readers what this blog is about. Haha.

Today is Deepavali holiday. My church organized an outing for some oldfolks at Bukit Batok Home for the Aged. It was suppose to be at Labrador Park, but somehow God's will is that we hold it in our church due to the rain. So we held it at the church. Pastor shared a message to encourage them.

The arrangement was that after that, the children will present 2 chinese hymns to sing to the old folks. They are 我是主羊 and 野地的花. Felicia, El, and I were drafted in to sing last minute. Haha.

The tunes for these 2 hymns are beautiful. I can't tell which one I love more. The one I attached to the background of this blog (please be patient as it is a wma, which takes longer to load than a midi) is 我是主羊. It is based on Psalm 23, my favourite psalm about the Lord being my Shepherd. How loving and what a wonderful Shepherd who protects and guides us. Here is the lyric:

我是主的羊

主领我到青草地，安歇在溪水旁，

黄昏时主与我一路同行.
牧场上凡是属于主的羊都强壮，

我是主的羊.

青草地、溪水旁，黄昏时有主与我同

行黑暗夜，路崎岖，

一步一步随主行.

The midi version can be found here: 我是主的羊

The next is based on Matthew 6:25 to 34, which talks about Christians not needing to fret over our bodily needs (money, food, clothes). God can provide for the sparrows which don't have souls, and clothe lilies which dies very soon, so how much more will He provide for His own children who are saved by Him, and belongs to His family through the Lord Jesus Christ.

I would love to share a recent happening in my life. Just Sunday, my father lost his job - again. It is worrying because it is very hard for non-PSLE non-English literate 59-year-olds to get a job. Yet he found one just a few days later (today). That is a coffee shop helper. The pay decreased by around 1/4, but the working hours are more humane and he thus have more time now to take care of his health. I had been worrying how his job is affecting his physical body, tiring him and wearing him down. Yet God is such a wonderful Father to provide Him with a new job that absolutely take away this worry of mine! (And his off day is Sunday!!!!! Reduces one excuse of him not to go to church. In future....I mean...if I really get down to telling him the gospel, that is...)

When I heard about him losing his job on Sunday, I was anxious. We humans really cannot see the plans that God has in future. My anxiety was a short-sighted reaction. Actually, we His children just have to pray and wait for His will to be done, because He promised that "all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose". This is such a merciful and great God who is so personal and endearing to those who are saved~! Wouldn't you want to believe in Him and give your life into His hands too?

野地的花，穿着美丽的衣裳，

天空的鸟儿，从来不为生活忙.

慈愛的天父，天天都看顾，

祂更愛世上人，為他們预备永生的路。

一切需要，天父已经都知道，

若心中烦恼，让祂為你除掉。

慈愛的天父，天天都看顾，

祂是全能的主，信靠祂的人真是有福。

I can't find a good music of this piece, it's mostly in pop-ish arrangement. You can go google and see if you can find any melody.

May fellow Christians find comfort in God. May those who aren't save have the desire to know who this God is. =)

SPG

2007-11-05T17:08:00.000+08:00

I'm sitting in AS4 (somewhere in NUS Arts fac) doing my project now. And right now, I'm successfully irritated by an SPG (Sarong Party Girl) sitting 1.5 metres away from me in another bench.

She is flirting and acting cute in front of her exchange-student boyfriend from America.

She is speaking in this fake rhotic accent (she's native Singaporean, yup).

She is conversing loudly with her boyfriend how to get away with him in Europe by cheating her mother (and other parents-dishonouring statements).

She is acting cute with all the baby noises.

She has successfully spoiled the tranquality of evening AS4 study bench area.

Shame to the Brits!

2007-10-31T23:43:00.000+08:00

Shameful! Poor old man...

Here's one of the 3 brit's shameful reply: http://www.asiaone.com/Digital/News/Story/A1Story20071031-33370.html

Hilarious!

2007-10-22T22:11:00.000+08:00

Sad life, housewives.

Keep377a

2007-10-19T12:27:00.000+08:00

The word of God on homosexuality:

Romans 1:26-32, "For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections: for even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature: And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust one toward another; men with men working that which is unseemly, and receiving in themselves that recompence of their error which was meet. And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a reprobate mind, to do those things which are not convenient; Being filled with all unrighteousness, fornication, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, murder, debate, deceit, malignity; whisperers, Backbiters, haters of God, despiteful, proud, boasters, inventors of evil things, disobedient to parents, Without understanding, covenantbreakers, without natural affection, implacable, unmerciful: Who knowing the judgment of God, that they which commit such things are worthy of death, not only do the same, but have pleasure in them that do them."

1 Corinthians 6:9-11, "Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind, Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you: but ye are washed, but ye are sanctified, but ye are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus, and by the Spirit of our God."

1 Timothy 1:9-10, "Knowing this, that the law is not made for a righteous man, but for the lawless and disobedient, for the ungodly and for sinners, for unholy and profane, for murderers of fathers and murderers of mothers, for manslayers, For whoremongers, for them that defile themselves with mankind, for menstealers, for liars, for perjured persons, and if there be any other thing that is contrary to sound doctrine;"

2 Peter 2:6, "And turning the cities of Sodom and Gomorrha into ashes condemned them with an overthrow, making them an ensample unto those that after should live ungodly;"

Jude 7, "Even as Sodom and Gomorrha, and the cities about them in like manner, giving themselves over to fornication, and going after strange flesh, are set forth for an example, suffering the vengeance of eternal fire."

To see more, click here: http://www.seafox.com/homo.html

God said it, that settles it. Whether you are a believer of God or not does not void His commandments.

Therefore have I signed the petition Keep377a. Background here: http://www.todayonline.com/articles/217510.asp

Come Thou Fount

2007-10-07T23:56:00.000+08:00

My background hymn currently is "Come Thou Fount", one of my favourite. Here's one choir singing this hymn. It's rather emotional and dramatic owing to the symphony orchestra. Look out for the lady who cried. There is really no need to "create" a praise-the-Lord atmosphere by jumping and shouting for people to be touched by the godly lyrics.

Click on your internet browser's "Stop" to stop my background music.

Lyric is here. The choir arrangement kinda switched some lines, but can be followed nonetheless.

Come Thou Fount
Come, Thou Fount of every blessing, Tune my heart to sing Thy grace;
Streams of mercy, never ceasing, Call for songs of loudest praise.
Teach me some melodious sonnet, Sung by flaming tongues above.
Praise the mount! I’m fixed upon it,Mount of Thy redeeming love.

Here I raise my Ebenezer; Hither by Thy great help I’ve come;
And I hope, by Thy good pleasure, Safely to arrive at home.
Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it, Prone to leave the God I love;
Here’s my heart, O take and seal it, Seal it for Thy courts above.

O to grace how great a debtor Daily I’m constrained to be!
Let Thy goodness, like a fetter, Bind my wandering heart to Thee.
Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it, Prone to leave the God I love;
Here’s my heart, O take and seal it, Seal it for Thy courts above.

The last stanza is my absolue favourite. It just reflects my personal struggle many a times.

They think I'm stupid 2

2007-10-03T11:59:00.000+08:00

I've reported to Yahoo.

New discoveries of the week

2007-09-28T13:28:00.000+08:00

Was randonly looking around Youtube. I found this opera piece "Nessum Dorma". Very dramatic piece, made famous by the late Pavarotti, and recently by Britain's Got Talent winner Paul Potts.

Here's one by the late Pavarotti. This is his last performance before he passed away.

This is another Britain's Got Talent favourite. Cute little girl!!

Random smiles and laughter Part I

2007-09-24T10:39:00.000+08:00

I believe we all have seen signs or slogans which makes us smile, or even laugh at the way in which it is phrased. English has managed to have an ambiguity in its syntax, and this brings about many jokes. So, in Random Smiles and Laughter, I attempt to share my smiles (or laughter) in celebration of English ambiguity with my readers.
No Waiting Within Bus Park (taking directly from "Car park").

Junk mails are no longer necessary

It has been 3 months...

2007-09-21T14:24:00.000+08:00

I haven't posted anything for 3 months. The main reason being, after my last post, my laptop is officially down. So I've been using my brother's computer. Well...I guess because the computer is not mine, it's not personal enough for me to be blogging my thought with it.

Now I have my new lappy, my Fujitsu S6410. It's not bad, just that the plugs are all at the wrong places. I have to bend my wires here and there. (And it seems to heat up easily...)

So now I'm in semester 3. Not bad, but very busy. A lot of readings. Particularly EL3255 (English in Southeast Asia)...I can't understand much. But CL2280 (Basic Translation) is quite fun. :) I'm enjoying it, though not performing well. I have a feeling I won't be able to retain my CAP this semester. :(

Several things happened of course. Some rather shocking. But I guess I'll leave them to the deep nights when I can't sleep to type them out.

By the way, I didn't realize how the movie "Hero" is so beautiful. It's not just cinema, but an art in itself in every scene. And Tan Dun's eerily beautiful soundtrack just adds to its beauty. My only gripe (as with many movies) is that WHY DO THEY HAVE TO INCLUDE A LOVE SCENE INVOLVING ZHANG ZIYI!!!!!!! Though there's no nudity, its suggestiveness is there. Simply gratituos and tasteless. Other than that, Jet Li, Tony Leung and Maggi Cheong are wonderful actors. Even 秦始皇 looks good in this film. Haha.

The Tower of Babel

2007-06-22T19:07:00.000+08:00

So Chris asked this question (this is not a rebuttle post, Chris, just that it's too long to write in ur comment box) :

"However, I still do not comprehend the Biblical story of Babel completely. Did the people have a means to build a tower to heaven? If not, why did God cause the construction to stop? Or was confounding meant to stop the people from trying to reach an unattainable goal which they surely would have strived for had they the means to. So this unrest caused by miscommunication is alright? As in, God planned for this?"

God's word is very clear that there can be no way to heaven except by faith in God (Lord Jesus Christ). Even in the Old Testament, all sorts of sacrifice that the Israelites were told to do were pointing to the Lord Jesus. God is very clear on that.

Gen 9:7 - "And you, be ye fruitful, and multiply; bring forth abundantly in the earth, and multiply therein."

Gen 11:4 - "And they said, Go to, let us build us a city and a tower, whose top [may reach] unto heaven; and let us make us a name, lest we be scattered abroad upon the face of the whole earth."

Note in 9:7, Noah's decendents are told to multiply and fill the earth. Note 11:4, the people said, "lest we be scattered". The decendents have sinned in wanting to contradict what God told them to do.

Note "let us make us a name". The building of Babel to reach heaven is NOT out of a desire to SEEK after God. Rather, it was out of ambition and pride, which the Lord HATES.

Also, as mentioned, their means to reach heaven is disobedient to the way in which they were told to do. Therefore, in the building of Babel, they have commited 3 great sins so far as we see.

God's plan for the people is to spread throughout the earth. Men may do things to hinder God, but God will somehow be able to bring His plans to pass. For whatsoever God said, it shall happen. The decendents of Noah chose not to obey, so God achieves His plan by dividing their tongue. As a punishment, this is also justified fully (not that God has to justify His actions to us).

Hope it answers.

Lappy spoiled...

2007-06-07T14:26:00.000+08:00

...last week. Brought it to Acer service centre, turned out the problem is with one of my Ram and one of the two ram slots. To replace it'll be $550...! So I didn't. Now the lappy is working with 1 ram (slower) on the good ram slot. Don't know when it will spoil again... :( Don't spoil, lappy, you're too expensive for me to repair you... :(

So I reformatted my lappy, and now it seems like I have to start everything all over. All my previous links that I saved under "Favourites" are gone. Some of my friends' blog adds are gone. Thankfully I can save my files first. But still, the sense of lost is still there.

But well, Lappy can start a new life. Hehe!

Recently attended a conference by Doc Bob Jones III and Doc Stephen Jones, Chancellor and President of Bob Jones University, the fundamental Christian University in South Carolina. Wonderful messages. I hope I'll not be lazy and post the messages notes up soon. :) Meanwhile, you can download Dr Bob Jones and Dr Stephen Jones' messages and listen to them. They are wonderful anointed speakers. :) Oh and Dr Stephen Jones' wife Mrs Benneth Jones also give short talks for women. Click on their names to see the messages. :)

For some reasons I wish to be in Bob Jones Uni studying. They have so many courses Singapore don't have. And better, it's a Christian University. Hehe. But nevermind, I'll be content with NUS. Afterall, God gave that to me for a reason. :)

Cheerz!

They think I'm stupid

2007-05-20T00:57:00.000+08:00

Late Mr Kee

2007-05-15T19:51:00.000+08:00

Mr Kee was a very harden person who had been rejecting the Lord whenever his wife tried to tell him to believe in Christ. But just recently, last friday night, he confessed the Lord Jesus Christ and accepted him.

Mr Kee died in the afternoon today. Thank the Lord he is saved and his sins are washed away with Christ's blood. It's such a wonderful salvation - to be saved at the last few days of his life. What if he had delayed it? What if he had said in his heart, "I can still wait for a few days." Perhaps the fact is that he is very old and very sick, and no doubt his last moments.

But dear friends, can you tell when will you die? This morning a tree fell and killed a mother while she was jogging! This kind of things may just happen to you and I. Are you ready to meet the Lord anytime He wants you?? Do you know where you will go?

You can email me if you want more details of what salvation is: carmenjiamin@yahoo.com

May God save you if you're not yet save. Those who are saved: always remember what great grace we have received, and that is why we ought to love the Lord with all our heart, soul, strength and might. May I add, to give our time fully and wholly to God, since Singaporeans are so kiam (stingy) with our time.

The one lying down is the late Mr Kee. The old lady on the chair is his wife, who was really joyous when he was baptised.

Happy Birthday to me!

2007-05-15T14:54:00.000+08:00

This year's birthday is the same day as Mother's Day! So I got a cake (lousy Bengawan solo one, cos all nice cakes' shops are fully booked). And bought Mommy a BodyShop orange flavoured shower gel. She likes it!!!! WOOHOO! As in, normally she would accept willingly of course, but this time she came to me and said she wanted it, but just that it's too dear to buy for self. hahaha!!!!!!!

These are my pressies!

The yellow vase is handpainted by Shama. The mouse and cheese toilet roll by Anna (with tips from Chris, right?!?!), and the BodyShop lip butter from Chris. Haha. She got it when we were browsing BodyShop. I am using the vase to put my little pinwheel that elf got for me. Haha.

The Nokia 6288 is from Elf!!! Got it when he knew I was going to get the phone (I wasn't hinting him ok!?!?!?)...early present. Haha.

And the angpows by none-other than my parents! Muack!

Yay!!! Thank God for sustaining me thus far, and saving me so my life has a meaning now!! That is the bestest best present!